Flying with Albatrosses
by Amethyst Turtle
Summary: Thirty-six different friendship pairings, told as thirty-six drabbles. Who needs romance when you have nakama? Complete!
1. Robin and Brook

AN: Since there aren't enough nakamaship fics (in my opinion), I've decided to create my own personal challenge. There are 36 possible two-person combinations in the crew. So, I'm going to write 36 drabbles, one for _every _friendship pairing possible (strictly to the crew, no Ace, sorry!)  
The lengths will vary, depending on my inspiration.

***

Title: Solo Duet  
Characters: Robin and Brook  
Rating: K  
Summary: In the middle of the night, Brook unexpectedly discovers they have another musician on the ship.  
A/N: If Brook wasn't such a pervert, I'm sure he and Robin could get along swimmingly. Oh, and I don't know where Brook put his piano on the ship so I just put it in the aquarium bar. Forgive me!

***

Even though it had been weeks since he had joined their ragtag crew, Brook still found himself wandering aimlessly on the ship during the night. The old habit had carried over. Brook hoped to rid himself of his insomnia soon. The moon hung silently over the Thousand Sunny. The ocean, as black as a shadow's eye, lapped up against the hull like a friendly puppy. Brook stood at the front of the ship, looking out to the sea over the lion figurehead.

_Ting ding… ding ding…_

Brook twisted his skull around curiously. It sounded like piano notes drifting through the night air…

_Ding ding…_

The notes began to play faster and faster until they blended together into a mess of melodies. Brook was puzzled. It was very late and everyone was supposedly asleep. The skeleton silently walked over to the door leading to the aquarium bar, where he kept his piano. He opened the door.

The piano player didn't stop playing even as Brook stepped closer. The skeleton squeezed his jaws shut so he wouldn't gasp out in surprise.

Robin's eyes were half-closed as her hands gracefully flitted across the keys. Two more arms had sprouted out of each of her elbows and were playing as well. She was playing a duet all by herself. The song had a resonating sound, a blend of sadness and happiness in an arpeggio of notes. It sounded like there wasn't a precise melody but Brook could pick out a subtle tune amidst the notes intermingling with each other. Brook cautiously laid a skeletal palm on her shoulder. Robin stopped playing and looked up.

"A duet isn't a duet if there is only one player." Brook quietly said. Robin smiled. She scooted over on the bench and her extra arms disappeared. Brook sat down beside her.

Their hands began to press the keys and they continued on with the duet, the piano song carrying through the ship.

***

AN: Don't ask me why Robin knows how to play the piano.  
SUGGESTIONS FOR THEMES ARE WANTED! Inspiration is needed badly. Requests for friendship pairings are also welcome.  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	2. Franky and Chopper

AN: Whoa! I didn't expect that much positive feedback for Chapter 1! Thanks!  
I meant for this one to be more serious, but come on people, it's _Franky _we're talking about here. It's also a huge gap from the first chapter, which was a lot more serious than this, which is quite silly and meaningless.

***

Title: I'll Be Your Dad  
Characters: Chopper and Franky, and a brief cameo from the resident cook  
Rating: K  
Summary: Everyone needs a parent, even those who aren't human.  
A/N: This is sort of hurt/comfort. With humor at the end. Blame the song I was listening to.

***

The ship was relatively quiet, unusual for such good weather. The boys were nowhere to be seen and the girls were silently sunbathing on the deck. Franky stood at the helm, letting the wind blow through his hair. He imagined he struck quite a figure with the sea before him and the wind on his side. Grinning in satisfaction, Franky walked down to the aquarium bar. He opened the dumbwaiter and shouted an order for a cola up it. Sanji yelled something back at him and chucked a bottle of cola down. Franky nimbly caught it in one hand. He turned around and stopped in his tracks.

Doctor-bro's face was pressed against the glass, watching the schools of fish swim around in the aquarium. Even with his furry back turned to Franky, the shipwright could tell he was crying by the way his shoulders twitched with hiccups. Tears were streaming down the glass.

"Oi, what's the matter, Reindeer-bro?" Franky asked.

"N-nothing!" Chopper said angrily, hastily wiping tears away with a hoof. "Nothing's wrong!"

"Don't try to hide it from me. You're easier to read than Luffy's picture books." Franky said, sitting down beside Chopper.

Chopper was silent for a moment before speaking. "Today's the day I left my herd."

"Your herd…" Franky said contemplatively. Chopper had never spoken about his own kind before, and Franky always assumed he had been with the Straw Hats forever.

Chopper nodded sadly. "I was rejected for my blue nose. My parents deserted me. I didn't have a family."

"Th-that's so sad!" Franky blubbered.

"I had a human dad, but he died. He died, all because of me!" Chopper broke down into tears. Franky pulled the little reindeer in for a hug.

"I'll be your dad, Reindeer-bro! Don't cry!" Franky sobbed.

"Waaaaaah!" Chopper hugged Franky. "You're too emotional!"

"Sh-shut up!" Franky bawled. "I love you, bro!"

"I'm not happy at all that you love me! Waaaaah!" Chopper bawled back.

"Waaaaaah! I'll be your dad!"

"Waaaaaah! That's too nice!"

"Waaaaaah!"

"Waaaaaah!"

"WILL YOU IDIOTS KEEP IT DOWN?!?" Sanji bellowed from the kitchen.

***

AN: Not so sure when the next update will be. Thanks for reading!  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	3. Luffy and Sanji

AN: Probably each drabble will have less and less meaning as I proceed on. So far, Chapter 1 is my personal favorite.

***

Title: Let's Keep the Turtle  
Characters: Luffy and Sanji  
Rating: K+ (all because of Sanji)  
Summary: Luffy becomes a bit too attached to a sea turtle meant to become their next dinner, much to Sanji's annoyance.  
A/N: Huh yup. Not much to say. I wrote this on a whim, which explains the supah early update.

***

Sanji thought the whole situation was pointless, not to mention completely idiotic. He stood in front of Luffy, who pleading eagerly while fake tears poured down his face (a trick Usopp had taught him).

"Luffy, _you're _the one who caught the shitty turtle and told me to cook it in the first place." Sanji sighed.

"But I changed my mind! He's just too AWESOME!" Luffy cried, hugging the giant sea turtle he had fished up earlier. The sea turtle was slowly waving its fins around and gasping for air in Luffy's tight hug. It was nearly as tall as Franky and its green shell was riddled with barnacles, algae, and miniscule crabs scuttling in and out of the mess that looked like it should have been in a tidepool.

"You said you were fishing for food. And that thing qualifies as food. You know, I can make a really good turtle soup and stir fried turtle flesh with-"

"Nooooooo! I wanna keep him!" Luffy shook his head furiously. The turtle continued squirming lazily, twisting its head around slightly to give Sanji a withering glare. It turned around again to nibble on the straw hat, but Luffy didn't seem to notice.

"Idiot! Since when do you turn down meat?"

"Since I found this cool turtle! Chopper's cool and we don't eat him, right?"

"That's different. Chopper's a crewmate." Sanji pinched the bridge of his nose.

"And this turtle is our new nakama! I'm naming him Mr. Lizard!"

"…You do know that's a sea turtle, right?"

"Yup. His name is Mr. Lizard, short for Sir Mister Lizard Koala Hippopotamus."

"..." Sanji stared at Luffy. He was never able to understand his captain's logic. Or what he called logic, anyways.

"So we can keep him, right?" Luffy asked, looking uncannily like a little kid asking his dad if he could keep a puppy he found in the alley. He stuck his lower lip out slightly. Psh. As if that would work on the weathered sea cook.

Sanji hesitated before making his verdict. "Fine! Fine! Don't complain about not having enough meat tonight, though. And you're taking care of that shitty turtle by yourself." Sanji threw his hands up in defeat.

"Yay! Thanks Sanji!" Luffy grinned. He jumped away, the mammoth sea turtle still in his arms. "Come on, Mr. Lizard! I'll introduce you to everyone else!"

The turtle glared at Sanji from over Luffy's shoulder as the captain excitedly ran to the men's quarters, presumably to set up "Sir Mister Lizard Koala Hippopotamus's" bunk.

"Tch. Ungrateful shitty turtle." Sanji muttered. But when he turned around to go back to the kitchen, he had the tiniest of smiles on his lips.

***

AN: Their tenth crew member should be something completely random like a giant sea turtle XD Nah, just kidding.  
Oh, and I think I found one of the BEST One Piece AMVs ever. Look up MAD/AMV ONEPIECE Pray 【CP9・エニエスロビー篇】on Youtube. Seriously. Even if you don't like AMVs, I bet you'll at least be slightly impressed by this one.  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	4. Zoro and Nami

AN: All the feedback doesn't make me happy one bit! I'm not happy at all! *noodle dance* No, I am not happy at all, bitches!

***

Title: Drinking Contest  
Characters: Zoro and Nami  
Rating: T (for alcohol, I guess)  
Summary: Zoro and Nami decide to have a little "friendly" competition.  
A/N: If my knowledge of the Strawhat crew is correct, Zoro and Nami have unusually high alcohol tolerance, right? Right? o_o

***

"You know, Zoro, we're the only ones left on the ship." Nami said casually, reading a newspaper in the kitchen while Zoro sat in the corner with a bottle of sake. Indeed, it was true. Sanji had taken Luffy and Brook with him to shop for supplies and Franky and Usopp decided to tag along. Then Chopper convinced Robin to come with him to look for some herbs in the forest by the town.

"Huh?" Zoro asked, having ignored what Nami just said.

"I'm bored." Nami sighed, leaning on the table with one hand, setting down her newspaper. She glanced at Zoro, who was sleepily chugging on the glass bottle.

"And that's my problem, why?" Zoro asked rather rudely, sake dribbling down his chin.

"You're such a jerk." Nami wrinkled her nose at him. After a moment of quick thinking, she grinned. "You know, I bet I can drink more alcohol than you."

"Don't be an idiot." Zoro said.

"What? You afraid of losing to a girl who can beat you up without breaking a sweat?"

"No, because it's happened a thousand and one times before." Zoro scowled. "I accept your challenge, but only if you don't bother me during your hangover." He walked over to the end of the kitchen and dragged out two crates of sake he had purchased the other day and set them on the table with a loud thump, the bottles inside clinking against each other. Zoro pried off the lids with one finger and tossed Nami the first bottle.

"Don't cry if you vomit." Zoro warned. Nami merely smiled and chugged down the bottle in a few seconds without a single drop spilt. Zoro grinned and grabbed a bottle for himself.

Two hours later…

"Aren't you done yet?" Nami said in exasperation, the two of them surrounded by an ocean of glass bottles.

"No. But it sounds like you're about to fall." Zoro said nonchalantly, tapping the last drops from his… eighty-something… bottle of sake into his mouth.

"Please!" Nami laughed. She frowned and glanced at Zoro. It really did look like he wasn't going to give up anytime soon. Well, she would have to fix that, wouldn't she?

"Zoro! Look! It's an onigiri!" Nami shouted dramatically, pointing somewhere behind him.

"Eh?" Zoro whipped around. Nami leaned over and shoved him, sending him toppling onto the carpet of bottles. Zoro tried to get up but kept slipping on the bottles. He glared up at Nami. "That was dirty, you bitch!"

"Oh, you just don't want to admit you lost to me." Nami smiled sweetly. "Be a good boy and take your defeat like a man."

"Shut up!"

"Oh, and you owe me ten thousand beri for losing the bet."

"What bet?!?"

"Hm? You don't remember? You must be _really _drunk then."

"Gah! Shut up!"

Nami laughed and walked away, leaving Zoro in the sea of empty sake bottles sputtering indignantly.

***

AN: "Zoro! Look! It's an onigiri!"  
That's my favorite line :D  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	5. Usopp and Franky

AN: It's about due time I gave Usopp his drabble. Poor guy; fangirls just aren't that attracted to liars with long noses. Noooooo, they drool over green hair and curly eyebrows. Where's the logic in that?  
No offense to any fangirls. I like Zoro and Sanji too, but Robin's still my favorite :T

***

Title: Impossibly impossible  
Characters: Usopp and Franky  
Rating: K+  
Summary: Franky decides to make the impossible become the possible.  
A/N: I think Franky can do anything. So ignore the laws of nature here and just go with Franky's supah flow.

***

Franky sat at his desk, fingers threaded through his hair as he tried to concentrate on the blueprints that lay out before him. He sketched some figures on a blank sheet of paper, but crumpled it up and tossed it to the side before even finishing it. Franky leaned back in his seat and sighed. If he didn't finish it tonight, Longnose-bro would still be in his dejected mood in the morning. He hated to see Usopp sad, like that afternoon…

_"Franky! Franky! What do you think of _these_?" Usopp shoved a slightly rumpled blueprint sheet into Franky's hands. _

_Franky examined the design. He frowned and handed them back. "Sorry, Longnose-bro. The measures won't fit and the material isn't suitable for a job like that. It's impossible to make." _

_"Oh…" Usopp looked down at the ground. "But I was positive it would work!" _

_"Try another one. Maybe it'll just take another try." _

_Usopp nodded vaguely and walked back to his workshop. Franky looked down and realized Usopp had left the failed blueprints by his feet. _

A massive fist slammed on the wooden desk. "Damn it! I'm Super Franky! I can make anything!"

Franky grabbed another sheet of paper and began scribbling furiously, glancing to the side at Usopp's original design every other second.

The next morning, the crew stepped out of their quarters for a huge surprise. Franky stood before them, grinning proudly with a hand resting on a humming machine that vaguely resembled a large cone with several knobs and buttons covering it.

"WHOAAA!!!" Usopp shouted excitedly, dancing around the finished machine while the rest of the crew ran about the ship, yelling in joy and catching snowflakes in their hands (except for Robin and Zoro, of course, who merely stood to the side and watched them play). "It's my snow machine! I told you! I told you it would work!"

"I tweaked around with the design a bit, but it should hold up for a long, long time." Franky grinned, scooping up a handful of snow and chucking it at Usopp. Usopp laughed.

"You bastard! I'll have you know I was the world champion for snowball fights, with a record toss of five thousand feet at a hundred miles per hour!" Usopp said. He and Franky ran off to join the others in a big snowball fight, their snow machine humming away and shooting snow up into the sky like white fireworks.

***

AN: They totally need a snow machine. That would make Luffy happy :D  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	6. Robin and Luffy

AN: Not much of a RobinxLuffy fan (I prefer Frobin or ZoRo) but Robin/Luffy never fails to make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside P:

***

Title: Dedicated to You  
Characters: Robin and Luffy  
Rating: K  
Summary: Sometimes even the crappiest of gifts can touch a person's heart.  
A/N: It's Luffy being Luffy, and Robin not being able to resist Luffy's Luffyness.

***

Robin's eyebrows went up half a centimeter as Luffy proudly handed her a waterlogged book, riddled with stains and falling apart at the binding. It was the color of the bottom of Zoro's shoe and smelled like wet Chopper.

"I found this at a store!" Luffy grinned. "See, look! The title there, it says _History in Context. _I'm not so sure what 'context' means, but I thought you'd like it. So here you go!"

"Thank you, Captain-san." Robin said purely out of politeness. One quick glance and she knew that the book would be unreadable. There was mold peeking out of the pages and some of the shredded pages hung loosely. Nevertheless, she accepted it and carried it to her and Nami's room. Robin planned to throw it out later when Luffy wasn't looking.

She changed her mind when she absentmindedly flipped the rotting cover open when shifting through some papers on the desk. There, on the water stained title page, in bright red ink were messy letters that read:

_To Robin, who reads a lot of history stuff whether it's boring or not! From Luffy _

There was a crude drawing of a cowboy hat and a straw hat sitting side by side below the message.

The book went in the library with Robin's collection.

***

AN: I have the next two chapters written out. Do you want to see Nami/Brook or Zoro/Sanji first?  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	7. Nami and Brook

AN: Due to the unanimous vote, here is Nami/Brook. Yohohoho!

***

Title: The Strangest of Gifts  
Characters: Nami and Brook, and some Robin  
Rating: K+ (for panties?)  
Summary: Nami is fed up with Brook's perverted ways. So what does she do about it?  
A/N: I swear, there are no stories about interaction between these two at all. I think. Not so sure if this qualifies as a friendship fic, but Nami is being _nice _to Brook… sort of.

***

Nami didn't _hate _Brook, exactly. She hated his bad manners, his afro obsession, and the way he always pestered her and Onee-sama about their panties. She hated plenty of things about him, but it was the way she hated Luffy's rashness or Zoro's laziness or Usopp's arrogance. The only person on the crew she had no trouble with whatsoever was Robin-onee-sama, and that was because _she _never asked Nami to see her panties. Unlike a certain skeleton Nami would gladly punch if his bones didn't hurt her knuckles so much when she hit him.

"May I have a gander at your undergarments?"

"NO."

Nami never understood why Brook refused to give up. Even after Robin lost her patience and tore off his feet and hid them somewhere (it turned out they were on top of the observation deck roof. _How _they got up there was beyond anyone), leaving Brook immobile for the better part of that fateful day, Brook continued to politely ask Robin what color her panties were.

"How have you not gone insane yet, Onee-sama?"

"Earplugs."

Even earplugs didn't work, because the minute Luffy spotted the objects in Nami's ears he plucked them out and began playing with them until they fell overboard. By then, Brook was sidled up beside Nami and was politely asking to see her panties. Nami was sure Robin didn't have that many earplugs to spare so she crossed off that from the list after kicking Brook hard enough so he was stuck up to the waist through a wall.

"Anything else?"

"Try ignoring Skeleton-san."

Oh, as if _that _would work. Nami simply didn't have the limitless patience her fellow pirate sister possessed.

"Perhaps I may have a slight peek of your panties?"

"NO."

No after no after no. And Brook never gave up. Even though Nami was reaching her snapping point (she was almost done writing out her will) she had to grudgingly admire the perverted skeleton for his perseverance. Oh, jeez. What was she thinking? It took a whole lot of booze to clear that thought from Nami's mind.

Then the idea came to her one morning. Nami nearly smacked herself for not thinking of it ages ago. She slipped into the women's quarters, making sure no one was watching.

That evening, Brook found a box with a string tied around it on his pillow. No one else was in the room. He curiously snipped the string off and opened the package. There was no return address or any of the sort. Brook lifted the layer of unecessary bubble wrap off of whatever was at the bottom of the flimsy cardboard box. His eye sockets widened, even though it should have been impossible. Blood spurted out of his nose cavity (even though he had no blood! Yohohoho!) and Brook began dancing around joyfully.

"Yoho! Yo! Yohohoho! YOHOHOHO!" Brook laughed happily, holding out several pairs of lacy women's panties in all sorts of colors out in front of him. "YOHOHOHO! YOHOOOOOHOHO!" He flopped back on his bunk, holding the panties to his face and giggling to himself.

Nami listened to Brook's joyful laughing down below in the men's quarters and nodded in satisfaction, leaning back in her seat. That ought to keep him occupied for another week or two. After that time passed, there would be plenty more to give to Brook. Nami smiled to herself, pleased with the arrangement. She was positive Brook was pleased with his gift, too.

"Nami-chan, why am I missing several pairs of my underwear?"

***

AN: Hm... this one sounded a bit too much like a Nami/Brook/Robin story. Eh.  
Next will be the Zoro/Sanji chapter, then after that, I dunno.  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	8. Zoro and Sanji

AN: I'm not so satisfied with this because it just seems so cliche. Does that even make any sense?

***

Title: A Smoke for a Thought  
Characters: Zoro and Sanji  
Rating: T (language)  
Summary: Sanji always knew smoking was bad for the health... oh? You thought he was referring to himself?  
A/N: This was longer than I would have liked it to be. Ah, whatever.

***

Sanji was all alone in the kitchen, washing the dishes. It was really late at night and everyone else had retired to bed after a long feast before they would reach the next island where they would replenish their food supplies. The multiple stacks of dirty dishes next to Sanji were nearly two feet tall, most of which were used by Luffy. Sanji dried off a plate and put it in the cabinet. He sighed. He really didn't feel like cleaning up tonight. Instead, Sanji stepped outside to get some fresh air.

The moonlight reflected off the waves and cast strange shadows across the ship. Sanji could hear snoring coming from the men's quarters. He took a deep breath of cold air, but something was off. Was that the smell of… cigarette smoke? Sanji scrunched his curly eyebrow in confusion. He hadn't smoked a cigarette since before the feast, and the sea breeze usually carried the smoke away in a few minutes. Frowning, Sanji walked across the deck, following the smell. His mouth opened slightly as he saw the figure standing at the front of the ship. It was Zoro.

"What the hell do you think your doing with _my _cigarettes, you shithead?" Sanji cried, striding up to him. Zoro didn't look at Sanji. Instead, he took another drag of the half-spent cigarette, smoke billowing out of his nose as he exhaled.

"What's it to you?" Zoro finally asked, the slight wind blowing the smoke away.

"I didn't know you were man enough to smoke." Sanji smirked.

Zoro shrugged. "The smoke helps me forget."

"What? Forget to mow your hair every three weeks?"

"I'm not in the mood, shit cook." Zoro scowled.

Sanji closed his mouth, stunned. Zoro had never turned down a fight before. Sanji turned to the sea, leaning against the railing. "So what's bothering you?"

"Why should I talk to you?" Zoro asked, taking another breath from the cigarette.

"Because we're nakama. And even though we hate each other's guts and I would gladly trade you for a bucket of fish bait, we're still nakama." Sanji said, glancing over at Zoro.

There was a long silence before Zoro answered after taking another deep breath of the smoke. "What would we do if the Marines ever caught us?"

Sanji flinched. "Don't ever say that, you shitty idiot! That's never going to happen! We're stronger than them!"

Zoro continued staring out to sea. "Robin was nearly taken to Impel Down. She was only a few steps away from death before we stopped them."

"But we saved her. And that's all that matters." Sanji said stubbornly. Zoro didn't answer. The only sound on the ship was the sound of the gently turning waves and muffled snoring.

"Smoking's bad for you, you know." Sanji finally said.

"You smoke."

"I'm used to it. If you keep it up, you'll shorten your life span." Sanji snatched the cigarette from Zoro's hand before he could protest and stomped it onto the deck. Zoro scowled.

"Shitty ero-cook."

"Idiot marimo. What were you doing looking through my stuff, anyways?"

"I was looking for an extra bar of soap."

"Oh, so the Neanderthal actually cares about his personal hygiene?"

"By the way, I showed Nami and Robin those plushie versions of them you have in your chest." Zoro smirked.

"YOU WHAT?!?"

"I told them that you sleep with their plushie counterparts at night."

"YOU SHITTY MARIMO!"

"Don't lie. I've seen you cuddling them. Where the hell did you even get those?"

"THAT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!"

Zoro laughed and walked away, grinning to himself. He called back over his shoulder. "You'd better come inside soon. I bet Plushie Nami and Plushie Robin are getting awful lonely waiting for you."

"SHUT UP!"

***

AN: Couldn't resist to add a classic Zoro/Sanji bicker at the end. :-|  
What friendship pairing shall I do next?  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	9. Usopp and Chopper

AN: I'm trying to even out my use of the characters. Since Usopp and Chopper each only had one appearance, this chapter will have both of them in it.

***

Title: Washah!  
Characters: Usopp and Chopper, and brief Robin and Zoro  
Rating: K+  
Summary: Usopp invents a whole new series of strange cries.  
A/N: It's impossible to make an angst or hurt/comfort with both of them. They're just too... happy ^0^ That's why I love both of them.  
Originally, I was going to have them bake a pie, but it turned out to be too long so I wrote this out instead. Plus, I don't even know how to make a pie.

***

The morning was cold, as usual, and everyone was sleeping, as usual. Usopp sat upright in his bunk, thin blanket wrapped around his scrawny figure. His nightcap was pulled over his eyes and he shivered as he attempted to stay warm. Luffy had built a crude parachute out of all their nice, thick, insulated winter blankets (that idiot) which resulted in them being cut up, sewn together, and shredded to bits. As a result, the men would have to use their thin summer blankets until they could buy more in the next town. And, of course, Nami refused to share hers with them and Robin simply didn't see _why _it was such a problem.

"Usopp? Are you awake?" Usopp heard Chopper whisper from the bunk below his.

"Yup. It's freakin' cold." Usopp whispered back.

"I can't sleep."

"Let's go outside!"

"Whaaaa? But it's too cold!"

"That's what real warriors do! They survive in all sorts of weather!"

"We'll get sick, though!"

"Not if we wear extra jackets, right?"

"Oh, right!" Chopper jumped out of bed, as did Usopp. They quietly snuck around the other men's bunks, swiping their sweaters and jackets. By the time they finished the round, Usopp was wearing twelve layers and Chopper resembled a ball of laundry. Giggling madly to themselves, they went outside.

"WASHAAAAAH! It's so COLD!" Usopp immediately shouted through six scarves.

"Hee hee! What's a washah?" Chopper giggled.

"Oh? WASHAAAAAAH!" Usopp shouted again, this time wiggling like a noodle for added affect.

"Let me try! WOOOSHAAAAAH!" Chopper shouted, his voice muffled by the wall of jackets surrounding his tiny body.

"And we can't ever forget SHADDUUUUUP!" Usopp yelled.

"SHADDUUUUUP!" Chopper repeated, laughing hysterically.

"What about KYAAAAPAAAAAH!" Usopp screamed.

"KYAPAAAAH!" Chopper screamed alongside him.

"WASHAAAAH!"

"KYAPAAAAAH!"

"I won't even ask..." Usopp and Chopper shrieked and whipped around. Zoro was standing behind them in nothing but a thin T-shirt and trousers.

"SHADDUUUP!" Usopp roared, wiggling around.

"YEAH! SHADDUUUUUUP!" Chopper repeated, attempting to bite Zoro's foot but failing due to the fact his layers of clothing prevented him from doing much other than rolling around.

"Uh huh. I'll be in the observation deck." Zoro walked away.

"PWASHAAAAAAH!" Usopp yelled after him.

"Pwashah! What's a Pwashah?" Chopper giggled.

"PWASHAAAAH!" Usopp yelled again.

"It sounds like WASHAAAAAH!" Chopper laughed, rolling around on the deck.

"YEEEEESHOOOOOH!" Usopp shouted.

"Eeeeheeee!" Chopper laughed, tears rolling down his face. "That's too much! Hee heeee!"

Usopp caught sight of Robin standing at the railing, looking out to sea. He quickly motioned for Chopper to be quiet, holding back laughter. Chopper stuffed his hoofs into his mouth, cheeks bulging from the effort to hold back his giggling. Usopp slowly snuck up behind Robin.

"WASHAAAAAAAH!!!" Usopp screamed when he was right behind her. Immediately, phantom arms shot out of Usopp's neck and began strangling him. Chopper shrieked.

"Oh, is that you, Longnose-kun?" Robin asked without turning around. "I'm sorry. You startled me, is all."

"EEEYAAAAAAH! ROOOOBIIIN!" Chopper screamed. The arms released the blue-faced Usopp. Robin walked away, smiling to herself.

"I'm sorry about nearly strangling you to death, Longnose-kun." Robin called over her shoulder.

"YOU LOOK TOO HAPPY ABOUT IT!" Usopp yelled. He crossed his arms and pouted. "Hmph."

"Let's go try it on Zoro!" Chopper said excitedly.

"Yosha! Let's go!" Usopp jumped up. They both ran to the observation deck, screaming and whooping along the way.

***

AN: They never learn, do they?  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	10. Franky and Sanji

AN: Hm. I got another 8 subs, and only two of them reviewed. Now, I'm not begging for reviews, but the silent favers/subbers bother me. Are they subbing because they like my story, or because they pity me, or because the story sucks and they want to see where it goes yadda yadda yadda...?  
Plus, I really like hearing other people's opinions.

***

Title: Cola Stew  
Characters: Franky and Sanji, and brief Luffy and Usopp  
Rating: K+  
Summary: Franky attempts to help in the kitchen. Not a good idea.  
A/N: Just a random idea. Not my best one, though.

***

When Franky entered the kitchen, he found Sanji laboring over a simmering pot of thick, rich stew that bubbled merrily over a tiny blue flame. Franky eyed the little ember scornfully.

"Is that little fire gonna do the job, Cook-bro?"

"Yup." Sanji answered without looking away. He was shaking spices in and stirring the concoction at the same time.

"I bet I can cook it faster with a Fresh Fire." Franky snorted. "That pansy wansy flame isn't gonna cut it."

"Don't. I'm making this especially for Nami-san and Robin-chan. It has to be _perfect_." Sanji stressed the last word. He took a tiny sip from the wooden spoon he was stirring with and added more salt.

"It's gonna take another hour to fully heat it at that rate the wussy fire's burning." Franky said, grabbing a bottle of cola from the fridge.

"It has to be _perfect_." Sanji repeated. He turned around to gather ingredients for a fruit smoothie, fruit after fruit piling up in one hand.

Franky glanced at the stew. It looked, put simply, delicious. Carrots and beef chunks bobbed at the surface along with other ingredients Franky couldn't name and it smelled heavenly. He snuck a peek at Sanji. He was washing the fruits. Franky edged closer to the stew and quickly stole a taste from the wooden spoon.

Franky smacked his lips. It needed more flavor. Shrugging, he began pouring his cola into the stew. The mixture took on a more bubbly appearance as the carbonated soda mixed in with gravy. Franky set the now-empty bottle aside and stirred the cola in.

"Oi." Sanji nudged Franky aside. Thankfully, the cook hadn't noticed Franky add the cola. Sanji spooned the stew into two bowls and set it on a tray.

"Uh, Cook-bro?" Franky began sweating. Sanji, not to mention Nami, would murder him for ruining the food. He shuddered to imagine what Robin would do if he got on her bad side.

"What?" Sanji answered as Franky followed him out the kitchen.

"About the stew…"

"No, you can't have any." Sanji neared the ladies, who were sitting underneath the tangerine trees. Suddenly, Sanji veered to the left to Luffy and Usopp, leaning against the railing. His expression remained blank.

"Here. It's on the house." Sanji handed the tray to them. Franky's eyebrows twisted around in confusion.

"YAAAAY!!! FOOD!" Luffy cheered, grabbing a bowl for himself.

"Gee, thanks Sanji!" Usopp grinned. He ignored the spoon and slurped up stew directly from the bowl, and spat it out into the sea a moment later with an expression between disgust and horror on his face. "GAAAAH! WHAT THE HELL?!?"

"Yummy!" Luffy had already finished his and reached for Usopp's, who gave it up without protest. "It tastes like cola! And meat! Meaty cola!"

"GAAAAH! MY TONGUE! IT BURNS!" Usopp screamed, dramatizing the situation.

"More cola-meat, Sanji! Saaaaanji!" Luffy demanded, licking the bowl clean.

Franky gaped at Sanji and looked away, rubbing his neck in guilt. "Eh, sorry 'bout the cola, Cook-bro…"

Sanji laid a hand on Franky's broad shoulder. Franky looked down at him in surprise, and his jaw dropped even further when Sanji laughed. Okay, so it wasn't much of a laugh, but it was a chuckle.

"You think I'm that stupid? I could smell the cola even when my back was turned." Sanji laughed again. Er, chuckled.

"So no hard feelings then, Cook-bro?"

"No. But you wash dishes tonight."

"Damn…"

***

AN: Does Sanji ever laugh?  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated (I'm lookin' at ya, silent subbers and favers).


	11. Zoro and Chopper

AN: By popular demand, Zoro and Chopper. I present to you. Oh, wait, I wrote that out wrong...

***

Title: Hide-and-Seek  
Characters: Zoro and Chopper  
Rating: K+  
Summary: Zoro and Chopper play a childish game.  
A/N: People seem to love this friendship pairing. I do too! It's so adorably brotherly and so fricken cute I- I- *passes out*

***

Chopper found Zoro sleeping against the mast, a snot bubble inflating and deflating out of his nose with his loud snores. Chewing on his lip, Chopper tugged on Zoro's sleeve.

"Hm? What do you want, Chopper?" Zoro grumbled, the snot bubble popping.

"Will you play with me?" Chopper asked.

"Go ask someone else. I'm sleeping." Zoro closed his eyes. Chopper tugged his sleeve again more insistently.

"But Luffy and Usopp are in town, Franky's busy with some project, Brooke is having composer's block and doesn't want to be bothered, Sanji is cooking dinner, Nami is no fun to play with, and I can't find Robin." Chopper said.

"She's probably in the library. Go bother her."

"She isn't in there. Or the aquarium bar, or the observation deck, or the dining hall, or her room, or the Docking Systems. Will you play with me?" Chopper repeated.

"Go make more Rumble Balls, or make medicine, or do those herb things you always do." Zoro said grumpily.

"I already did. We're set for another three weeks."

"Arrrgh… fine." Zoro stretched his arms, yawning loudly. He dragged himself upright and glared down at Chopper, who was wiggling with happiness. "What do you want to play?"

"Let's play Hide-and-Seek!" Chopper said excitedly.

"That's a kid's game. Eh, whatever." Zoro shrugged.

"Okay! Count to thirty!" Zoro heard Chopper scramble away as he closed his eyes and leaned against the wall.

"… twenty-eight, twenty-nine, thirty. I'm coming to find you now." Zoro called after he finished counting. He turned around, and raised an eyebrow.

Chopper was hiding behind an upturned barrel someone had left in the middle of the deck. He was hiding the wrong way, of course.

"I can see you, Chopper." Zoro sighed.

"EH?!?" Chopper shouted. He slowly edged to the left so his body was hidden.

Zoro couldn't hold back a chuckle. "Come on, Chopper. I found you. You're a really bad hider."

"BASTARD!!!" Chopper suddenly flung himself at Zoro and landed on the back of his head, where he hung on for dear life as Zoro jerked around in surprise.

"Gah! Get off!" Zoro yelled, spinning in circles.

"Weeee!" Chopper giggled, still holding onto the back of Zoro's green fuzzy head.

"Oh? You think that's fun, huh?" Zoro grinned evilly. He jumped high up into the air, and began to fall down rapidly.

"Eeeeeeck!" Chopper screamed in delight. At the last second, Zoro used the momentum of the fall to launch himself up the mast, where he pushed off of it with his feet up to the observation deck. Chopper continued to laugh as Zoro nimbly climbed up the side of the ball-shaped room, startling several seagulls as he pulled himself up onto the roof.

"We're so high up!" Chopper shouted, exhilarated.

"See those people? They're like ants." Zoro pointed out some people on the harbor below them, scurrying around. He was no longer trying to dislodge Chopper from his head.

"Wooow! They're so puny!" Chopper said in awe. "This is so cool, Zoro!"

And Zoro couldn't help but smile.

***

AN: Zoro, we all know you can't resist the puppy eyes. Just admit it. :D  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	12. Luffy and Nami

AN: I DARE SOMEONE TO WRITE A BROOKxOC STORY (or a BroNa or a BroRo... whatever you wanna callit). Whoever does earns my eternal respect and admiration. Yes, even if it's crack.  
Since everyone on the crew has their own pairing(s), Brook obviously needs one.

***

Title: Idiotic  
Characters: Luffy and Nami, and a bit of silent Robin (she's the only one who can calm Nami down)  
Rating: K+  
Summary: Luffy ruins one of Nami's maps, and tries to make it up to her.  
A/N: Luffy is so childlike. And that's why we all love him :3

***

He really had gone too far this time.

Nami stood in the doorway of her and Robin's quarters, trembling in rage with her fists clenched tight. Luffy was sitting in the middle of a pile of shreds; shreds of her latest map of the island they were docked at.

"Nami! I can explain!" Luffy frantically said, trying to get up, which only crumpled the shreds even more. "See, Usopp told me that this slug monster ate a flower, which caused it to-"

"I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT!" Nami snapped, punching Luffy across the face. He slammed into the bed, his cheek already swelling. "I spent TWO DAYS on that map! Do you have ANY idea what you've done, you blundering idiot?!?"

"It was an accident!" Luffy protested, nursing his face wound.

"Two days…!" Nami collapsed to her knees, gingerly scooping up shreds smeared with now illegible ink. "All wasted…"

"I-I'm sorry, Nami." Luffy hung his head.

"GET OUT!" Nami threw her shoe at Luffy, and he quickly dashed outside. Robin entered the room seconds later. She silently kneeled on the floor next to Nami without a word, her face somber. Nami flung herself into Robin's arms, muffling her screams of anger into the crook of Robin's neck.

"That idiot…!" Nami muttered furiously, blinking back tears as Robin patted her back comfortingly without saying a word.

---

Nami lounged on a deck chair, attempting to enjoy the sun while she could. She knew she would have to remap everything after lunch. For now, she just wanted to rest.

"Nami?"

"What do you want, Luffy?" Nami answered coldly, lifting up her sunglasses. The captain was standing before her, no signs of fear or nervousness on his face.

"I'm really, really sorry about ruining your map. You can blame Usopp for giving me that story about the flower-eating giant slug that poisoned all the ink supplies." Luffy said.

"It's your own fault for believing such a stupid story." Nami scowled. "Now go away."

"That's not all I wanted to say!" Luffy said hastily. "I know how upset you were, so I left the ship and mapped everything! That way you won't have to remap the island!" He handed her a rolled up piece of paper.

Nami unrolled it. The island was obviously out of proportions, but she could tell that Luffy had painstakingly drawn out the details of the shoreline, and had even drawn the forest and mountain at the center. Nami traced a finger over the harbor at the bottom of the lopsided island where they were docked at. Even though it was obvious he had put a lot of effort in it, the map was still extremely messy. There wasn't even a compass rose.

"What do you think?" Luffy rocked back and forth on his heels, smiling hopefully.

"It's…" Nami's tight grip on the map loosened. She looked up. "I forgive you, Luffy. Just this once, though! Don't get any stupid ideas!"

"Yaaay! Now we're all happy!" Luffy cheered. He jumped up to the kitchen. "Sanji! Make some celebration meat sandwiches!"

Nami laughed softly. "Luffy, you are such an idiot…"

***

AN: She's right. He is an idiot. But he's a lovable idiot.  
Next will most likely be Robin/Sanji. But who knows, I might change my mind.  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	13. Sanji and Robin

AN: Special thanks to Lady Emzebel for taking the challenge! Brook and Robin do make a lovely couple XD

***

Title: No Sleep  
Characters: Sanji and Robin  
Rating: K  
Summary: Robin never sleeps, and Sanji is saddened.  
A/N: Warning: some angst. Beware! Can be interpreted as SanRo. But it's just Sanji being Sanji, and Robin being Robin.

***

Robin never slept.

Not in the literal sense, of course. She slept when she needed to, only when her body was reacting sluggishly to her mind and when her vision began to wobble with dizziness. It was purely out of habit. As a child, she hardly ever had time to rest. It was run, run, run, all the time. Running from guns pointed at her temple, running from greedy hands grabbing at her neck, running from marines hell-bent on weeding all the knowledge out of her young mind… it was very tiring, both to her body and to her spirit. The only good things that came out of her constant running were her enhanced endurance and adaptation to little sleep (the cook would probably also add in her lean, muscular legs and toned figure). It was a wonder she had survived with such an unbalanced lifestyle of too much exercise and too little rest.

The habit hadn't changed much when she joined the Strawhat crew. Often, Nami would wake up to find Robin patiently waiting for sunrise with a book in her hands, or Zoro would discover the Oharan sitting in the observation room, watching the morning sea. They didn't think much of it and assumed she was an insomniac. In a way, it was true.

Robin was sitting beneath the tangerine trees with a thin blanket wrapped around her shoulders. The sun was just beginning to rise above the horizon, needle rays of light escaping up to the baby pink sky.

"Robin-chan?" Robin didn't need to turn around to know it was Sanji, probably kneeling beneath the branches and looking at her curiously. "Why are you up so early?"

"I'm always awake at this hour, Cook-san." Robin calmly replied.

"Like a beautiful phoenix, rising above the glass ocean in a trail of radiant azure flames." Sanji said poetically. He sat down beside Robin in the grass, not noticing the morning dew getting his pants wet.

"What an extravagant simile." Robin smiled.

"Thank you, Robin-chan." Sanji bowed his head deeply and kissed her hand. He suddenly frowned. "I hope you don't mind me asking, but when do you sleep?"

"When I need to. Three or four hours at the most." Robin shrugged nonchalantly.

"And yet your beauty remains intact flawlessly!" Sanji said. "But why don't you get more rest? You deserve it."

"Sometimes we don't get things we deserve." Robin looked far off in the distance. "Sleep is one of those things."

"But you're one of those people who _should _be granted a bit of kindness." Sanji shook his head stubbornly. "It hurts me, to know how much you stay up all alone during the night."

"You're being too sweet again, Cook-san. I became used to it long ago. Before that, I was often so exhausted I couldn't even move my limbs." Robin smiled sadly.

"And you probably starved too, huh, Robin-chan?" Sanji's eyes took on a melancholy look.

"Yes."

"I know that feeling, too."

Robin and Sanji sat in silence together, letting their words linger with the steadily rising sun. They heard Zoro's weights clinking against the floor up in the observation room and Franky doing something with a chainsaw in his workshop. Another day was beginning.

"You should come inside for breakfast soon." Sanji spoke up. He smiled hopefully. "And if you ever have any problems going to sleep, Robin-chwan, y-you can always s-sleep with- ah, with-"

Robin laughed as Sanji dashed away, a silly grin on his bright red face.

***

AN: I'm aiming for a Brook/? chapter next.  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	14. Brook and Usopp

AN: Based on the number of hits and reviews, I've estimated that... Sanji/Franky is my most popular chapter, and Sanji/Robin is the least popular. I guess it's because Sanji/Robin had too much angst ^^"  
For this chapter, ignore the laws of nature and the fact that there isn't enough room inside of Brook's skeleton. Go with the flow.

***

Title: Hiding Places  
Characters: Usopp and Brook, and bits of angry Zoro  
Rating: K+  
Summary: Usopp finds a new hiding spot where no one will ever find him.  
A/N: We've seen Brook bare his empty ribs, so where does the food go when he eats it? Just a thought.

***

"Please stop wiggling around so much, Usopp-san."

"Well, if you would stop swaying back and forth we wouldn't have a problem!"

"Yohohoho! That tickles!"

"Aaah! Don't let him know I'm in here!"

"Oops, I'm sorry!" Brook began humming loudly.

"That's not inconspicuous at all!"

"How about this?" Brook began singing. "Yohoho… yo ho ho-oooh~"

"That's no better whatsoever! Just stay quiet, please!"

"As you wish, Usopp-san." Brook leaned against the mast and ceased humming. Usopp was curled up inside of Brook's hollow body, hidden by the skeleton's large coat. He reached between two ribs to pull the jacket flaps closer together like curtains.

"Yohohoho! My ribs are ticklish!" Brook whispered, trembling with the effort not to laugh.

"Sorry! Sorry!" Usopp whispered back, curling up into a tighter ball. He gingerly pulled the jacket flaps apart by a fraction of a centimeter (without touching Brook's sensitive ribs) to allow the tiniest peephole. Usopp nearly shrieked when he saw a very angry Zoro stomping up to Brook. Zoro's hair was coated in some sort of tar, which was dripping down his face.

"Brook! Have you seen Usopp anywhere? I need to kick his ass." Zoro growled, wiping tar out of his eyes with an angry swipe of his fingers. Usopp crossed his fingers and curled up even tighter, but Zoro didn't seem to notice the large trembling bulge protruding out of Brook's middle.

"No, I haven't seen him all day. I apologize." Brook coolly said.

Zoro stalked away, muttering curses under his breath. Usopp sighed in relief.

"Thanks, Brook!" Usopp whispered.

"You're quite welcome, Usopp-san. Can you get out of me now?" Brook asked, shifting uncomfortably with Usopp's weight inside of him.

"Ah, right." Usopp slid down and out of Brook through the little space below his ribcage where his intestines would have been.

"Yohohoho! I just gave birth!" Brook laughed merrily.

"THAT'S JUST DISGUSTING!" Usopp shouted. "AND BABIES DON'T COME OUT OF THERE!"

"There you are, you bastard!" Zoro was running back towards them, drawing a sword out.

"EEEEYAAAAAH!" Usopp sprinted away, shrieking to the heavens.

"Oh, what a lovely day to be alive! Ah, but I am not alive… or am I? Yohohoho! Skull joke!" Brook laughed loudly over Usopp's shrieking and Zoro's cussing.

***

AN: Run, Usopp, run!  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	15. Usopp and Luffy

AN: I'm back! From vacation, that is.  
Yes, yes, I know. What's up with two Usopp chapters in a row? Well... I dunno.

***

Title: The Snail That Lives in Your Nose  
Characters: Usopp and Luffy, and some Nami at the end.  
Rating: K  
Summary: In which Usopp attempts to make Luffy stop picking his nose.  
A/N: This is based off a poem by Shel Silverstein I read when I was just a wee toddler. I forgot its title, though :(. He's a great poet.

***

Usopp and Luffy were sitting on the railing of the ship, trying to fish up a snack before dinner. The waters were still and there weren't any bites. The boys were on the verge of dozing off, their bodies dangerously leaning forward. Usopp glanced over sleepily at Luffy.

"Ew, Luffy, stop that!" Usopp said as Luffy flicked a booger into the sea.

"Why? Maybe it'll attract some fish." Luffy said lazily.

"It's still gross! Why do you pick your nose, anyways?"

"I dunno." Luffy shrugged, yawning. Usopp squared his shoulders and took a deep breath. It was time to break Luffy of the habit.

"Hey, do you want to hear a story?" Usopp asked slyly.

"Yeah! Yeah yeah yeah!" Luffy bounced up and down eagerly.

"Okay. Did you know that everybody has a sharp-toothed snail living in their nose?" Usopp said, lowering his voice.

"Whaaaaaat?!?" Luffy's jaw dropped in disbelief.

"Yeah! If you pick your nose too much, you'll be disturbing this sharp-toothed snail. Now, this snail is _very _temperamental so-"

"Like Zoro?"

"Eh, yes. Like Zoro. And what does Zoro do when you bother him too much?"

"He cusses and tries to slice you up!"

"Exactly." Usopp nodded.

"So the snail that lives in my nose will cuss at me then cut me up if I bother it?" Luffy asked, eyes wide.

"No! No! This sharp-toothed snail is different. If you poke your finger a little too high up your nose…" Usopp stuck a finger in the air for added affect, "… then chomp! The sharp-toothed snail will bite it right off."

"Aaaaaah! That would hurt!" Luffy sucked on his pointer finger, imagining the pain it would cause.

"You see now? That's why you must _never _pick your nose again." Usopp said.

"Okay! I'll never pick my nose again!" Luffy nodded his head vigorously. "I promise!"

--

Usopp was fixing up one of his projects in the comfort of the shaded grass lawn when Nami burst outside, her crimson face practically steaming.

"WHERE DID HE GO?" Nami screamed, shaking Usopp back and forth like a rag doll.

"Don't hurt me!" Usopp squealed, shielding his face with his arms.

"GAH!" Nami ran off. Luffy poked his head from the hatch leading below deck.

"Is she gone?" Luffy whispered loudly.

"What the hell did you do?" Usopp hissed, looking around nervously.

"Well, I tried to look for the sharp-toothed snail in her nose while she was sleeping, since I promised I wouldn't pick mine. I couldn't find the snail." Luffy frowned, tapping the side of his own nose thoughtfully. "I even stuck my finger in there but nothing bit me."

"EEEYAAACK! You _picked _Nami's nose?!?" Usopp shrank back, staring at Luffy in horror.

"You bet I did! You lied! There is no sharp-toothed snail!" Luffy pointed a finger accusingly at Usopp. As if to prove his point, Luffy grabbed the tip of his rubber nose and stretched his nostrils open, baring all his nose hairs and mucus at Usopp. "See? No snail!"

"LUFFY!!!" Nami's voice echoed all over the ship so evenly it was impossible to tell where she was. "YOU'RE DEAD!"

"Uh oh." Luffy jumped up the mast, presumably to go hide on top of the observation room. Usopp saw his finger stuck up his nose as he launched himself up in the air.

"STOP PICKING YOUR NOSE, LUFFY!" Usopp yelled.

"NEVER!" Luffy yelled back.

***

AN: Nami is so amusing when she's angry :D  
Next will most likely be a Robin/Chopper. If I can remember what I was planning to write for it...  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	16. Robin and Chopper

AN: These two make such cute friends. I love them to death.  
RoCho, on the other hand... uh... bestiality...? o_O

***

Title: Flying with Albatrosses  
Characters: Robin and Chopper  
Rating: K+  
Summary: Robin helps Chopper fly.  
A/N: Oh my gosh, it's the title of the entire story itself. I didn't plan the corresponding titles thing, it just came. Besides, I think this chapter is special. Albatrosses are also my favorite bird species. They can cross miles of ocean without having to flap their wings once *0*

***

The sky was blue, the breeze was gentle, and the ocean was in a calm, quiet mood. Chopper was lying on his back in the grass watching the empty sky pass by. The ship was unusually quiet, seemingly affected by the day's sleepy atmosphere.

Chopper sat up in excitement as a few giant albatrosses flew overhead, their shadows darkening the ship for split seconds. Their gargantuan wingspans were at least thirty feet wide and their intelligent dark eyes gazed down at Chopper, who was staring up at them in awe.

"Hi!" Chopper called up to the mammoth seabirds, waving a hoof at them furiously.

"Yo." One of the albatrosses called back in its native avian tongue. It soared higher above its companions with the tiniest flick of its wings. Chopper sighed. How he wished he could glide with them, to feel the wind rush through his fur and the whole world far below him.

Chopper squealed in surprised as he felt the skin on his back stretching. Arms were sprouting out of his back one after the other at a rapid pace. "Robin!"

He twisted his head around side to side, but there was no sign of her. The only hint of her presence was the intricate network of arms protruding out of either side of his back. A particularly strong wind blew through the ship, and Chopper realized that his hooves had left the ground and the arms were twisting here and there, catching the breeze.

Then Chopper shot up into the sky, Robin's wings flapping to bring him higher up alongside the albatrosses, who were regarding him with a sort of curiosity.

"Yo?" one of the albatrosses tilted its head, examining Chopper's wings made out of slender human arms.

"I'm flying! I'm flying!" Chopper shouted out happily, spreading his own furry limbs apart for good measure, the wind bringing him higher. He looked down. The ship was the size of a beetle on an endless sheet of blue paper, but he could make out the tiniest purple speck watching him from below.

"I'm not happy at all, Robin you bitch! I'm not happy at all! Bitch! Asshole! Bitch!" Chopper screamed down, laughing joyously as he soared with the albatrosses.

"Yo!" the albatrosses accepted their new companion, pecking Chopper affectionately.

Down on the ship, Robin smiled and leaned back against the mast.

***

AN: So if Robin can only fly for five seconds with Cien Fleur: Wing, I'm guessing someone with less weight like Chopper can fly much longer.  
Aaaah, I just loved that moment in Thriller Bark when she's all like _Cien Fleur: Wing! _and Franky's all like _You can fly?!? _and she's all like _Yes. But only for five seconds_ and then Franky's like _EH?!? _and then Robin used Franky as a stepping stone to save herself first... X3  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	17. Zoro and Brook

AN: So random. So completely, idiotically random.  
If every person who subbed actually reviewed, there would be at least 28 per chapter. Just a thought.  
Oh god I sound like such a review whore... I'm sorry :(

***

Title: Hair Buddies  
Characters: Zoro and Brook  
Rating: K  
Summary: Brook has the wrong idea about things.  
A/N: Of all the Strawhats, I think Brook, Zoro, and Franky have the most unique hair. An afro, green fuzz, and this bright blue… thing of AWESOMENESS.

***

Zoro was working out in the observation room, enjoying the peace and quiet. The rest of the crew was who-knows-where (probably lost) and for once, there was no rubber bullet or perverted cook or money-grabbing witch to bother the first mate's training.

"Six hundred!" Zoro grunted, his arms straining from the two-ton weight he was lifting. Sweat had matted down his hair and made his skin sticky.

"Zoro-san?" Brook's poofy head popped up through the hatch. "May I come in?"

"I'm training." Zoro responded curtly, veins bulging in his neck and forehead from the strain.

"Very well. I simply wanted to give you a little gift." Brook came inside nonetheless. He was carrying a paper bag in one hand.

"What for?" Zoro asked, eyeing Brook.

"Just for a fellow swordsman." Brook grinned. He was always grinning, but there was a slight difference in the alignment of his jaws whenever he was truly smiling.

"Fine." Zoro sighed, setting down the weight carefully with a loud clank. "Give it here."

"I'm sure it will come in handy." Brook reached into the bag and placed a plastic bottle in Zoro's hand. Zoro glanced down at it.

"Shampoo? The hell?" Zoro raised an eyebrow. He scowled. "Did that shitty cook set you up for this?"

"No! No! I was thinking about how much care you must put into your hair to keep it so vibrantly green, I-"

"It's natural! I didn't dye it!" Zoro said in exasperation.

"But how!" Brook put a hand to his cheekbone in surprise.

"I don't know! Ask Franky! His hair is natural too!" Zoro said, becoming more irritated.

"Oh…" Brook shifted uncomfortably. "Well, I was simply imagining that we both take care of our hair, so we could have become, ah, hair buddies?"

Zoro stared at Brook blankly. "… you're kidding, right?"

"Yohohoho! I wish I was! Ah, what an awkward moment!" Brook laughed. "Yohohoho!"

"Don't say that! It only makes it more awkward!" Zoro shouted.

"Yohohoho!"

***

AN: Brook is such an awkward guy. I love him X)  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated (still watching you, silent favers/subbers. FEAR MY SHEEP EYE!).


	18. Sanji and Nami

AN: Happy New Years Eve, everyone! I can't believe we're already halfway through with this :0

***

Title: My Little Kitty  
Characters: Nami and Sanji  
Rating: K+  
Summary: Sanji is jealous of...?  
A/N: I have this feeling that someone already did this idea before, but I can't exactly remember if it _was _done before or not. Arrrgh, I don't want to be accused of plagiarism, but I just can't think of anything else to do. To whoever's idea this was originally, I'm sorry!

***

Sanji was, for the most part, irritated. For one thing, the tiny little ball of doom ate nearly as much as Luffy (Sanji didn't even know how all the food fit in its little body) and, most importantly, the thing _stole _his Nami-san.

The cook sat dejectedly in the kitchen, chewing on a sandwich that tasted like cardboard. He stiffened as he heard Nami's giggling coming from outside.

"Nami, I wanna play with him!"

"Well, fine, but-hey! Ah! Spit him out! Spit him out, you idiot!"

Sanji smirked. He would give Luffy extra dessert if he actually did eat the damn kitten that had stowed away on their ship.

"Phew. Luffy, you moron! Go away!"

Well, it looked like that didn't work. Sanji sighed loudly. It seemed something would have to be done. He walked confidently outside, but he choked when he saw his Nami-san cuddling and playing with the little fuzzy kitten. How he wished he was in the kitten's place. Then Sanji forced himself to look away when the kitten rubbed up against Robin's (smooth, elegant) legs, inviting her to play with them. Something seriously had to be done.

Later that night, while Nami was in the shower, Sanji found the kitten rolling around in the grass. He quietly snuck up on the cat and swooped down on him in one smooth motion, snatching him up by the scruff of his neck.

"Mrroww!" the kitten yowled, clawing at Sanji. Sanji held the cat before him out at a safe distance, smirking with satisfaction.

"Sanji-kun? What are you doing with Tangelo?"

Crap. Sanji whipped around. "Nami-swan! I-ouch! Damn cat!"

"Tangelo" had nipped Sanji's fingers, making him drop the cat onto the deck. The kitten immediately leapt into Nami's arms and purred contentedly.

"You named the thing?" Sanji asked disappointedly.

"Yes… oh, I get it." Nami laughed, seeing his morose expression. "You're not _jealous _of Tangelo, are you?"

"No!" Sanji blurted out. "It's just that… that shitty cat eats more than the rest of us, and we might run out of supplies…"

Nami looked at Sanji blankly. "You don't have to lie, Sanji-kun. I understand."

"I'm sorry, Nami-san." Sanji looked away in shame.

Nami sighed, and before Sanji could respond, she rubbed the top of his head and gently scratched behind his ears.

"MELLORIIIINE~!" Sanji sang, reenergized and wiggling at full speed.

Tangelo hissed at Sanji, but the cook was too busy noodle-dancing around Nami to notice.

***

AN: I love Sanji. He's so silly around women X3  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	19. Luffy and Franky

AN: Sanji and Nami was quite a popular one! ^-^  
Happy 2010!

***

Title: Silly Impressions  
Characters: Luffy and Franky, and bits of Chopper  
Rating: K+  
Summary: Luffy puts his rubber characteristics to "creative" use.  
A/N: If you ask me, the Monster Trio should become the Monster Quartet, with Franky as the new addition. But that makes it sound like some barbershop choir, doesn't it?

***

Franky casually strolled outside, his fridge filled with fizzling cola and a hot, juicy burger in his hand. He was in a good mood and planned to treat everyone to one of his super dances after dinner.

"Usopp impression!"

"Eh?" Franky looked to the side and saw Chopper laughing at Luffy, who was waving his arms around and shouting something. Franky walked closer to see that Luffy had stretched his nose out about six inches.

"Luuuuffy! What the heeell?!?" Luffy shouted in a squeaky voice.

"Heehee!" Chopper giggled, banging his hoofs on the ground. "That's great!"

"Oh, how about this one?" Luffy furrowed his brow down and scowled, crossing his arms together. "I'm trying to sleep, you bastards."

"Zoro!" Chopper squealed, laughing harder.

"Nice impressions, Strawhat-bro." Franky grinned.

"Franky, check this out!" Luffy put his hands on his hip and sighed, rolling his eyes. "You guys are all morons, and owe me a hundred billion beri each! NOW SHUT UP OR I'LL PUNCH YOU!"

Franky burst out laughing. "Girlie's gonna kill you if she sees that super impression of her!"

Luffy didn't answer, as he had caught sight of the burger in Franky's hand. He suddenly grabbed for it. Franky pushed him back, holding the burger behind him.

"Oi! You can't have any! Who knows when Cook-bro will make me another burger like this?" Franky bit off a large piece of it, chewing noisily. Luffy frowned, and then his eyes suddenly lit up.

Chopper held back giggles as Luffy bit down on his thumbs and blew just a little bit so his forearms inflated. He unbuttoned his vest and swept up his hair so it stuck straight up as if it were struck by lightning. Franky raised an eyebrow, finishing off the rest of his burger.

"Ow! Check me out! SUPER!" Luffy shouted in a high-pitched voice, wiggling his butt around and slamming his inflated forearms together.

"I DON'T SOUND ANYTHING LIKE THAT!" Franky shouted. Chopper was rolling around in the grass, laughing hysterically.

"Eh? Says who?" Luffy raised an imaginary pair of sunglasses, squinting one eye just like Franky's incredulous expression. "If you ask me, I think I sound pretty SUPER! OW!"

"You wanna go, Strawhat-bro???" Franky raised his fists threateningly.

"Why? Can't we just DANCE and be super?" Luffy asked, still using his high-pitched voice and wiggling around in a way that was supposed to resemble Franky.

"I DON'T DANCE LIKE THAT EITHER!" Franky shouted. Chopper had already passed out from laughing too hard and depriving his body of oxygen.

"I'm not of-offended! And I'm not c-crying at all! Waaaaaah!" Luffy bawled, rubbing imaginary tears away from his eyes. Franky tried to scowl, but couldn't help but chuckle a little.

"Yeah, I guess that does sort of sound like me."

"Waaaaaah! I love you bro, damn you! Waaaaaaah!"

Franky began sniffling. "I'm not THAT emotional, damn it! C'mere!"

Franky pulled Luffy into a bear hug, crying loudly.

"Damn it! I'm not crying at all!" Luffy sobbed.

"Neither am I!" Franky bawled.

"Waaaaaah!"

"Waaaaaah!"

Meanwhile, Chopper had woken up and had silently tip-toed away.

***

AN: Haha, awkward... 6_6  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	20. Robin and Usopp

AN: Haha, I jammed my pinky and now the right side of my left hand is all swollen and bruised. Oh, the silly things I do ^x^

***

Title: Thank You, Sogeking  
Characters: Robin and Usopp  
Rating: K  
Summary: Robin asks Usopp where his friend had gone to.  
A/N: I absolutely loved that moment in the Sea Train when Sogeking was talking to Robin. It was really the first real friendship moment between those two (in my opinion, anyways), since Usopp was originally scared of her when she first joined the crew.

***

Usopp sat smack dab on the grass, his chin resting on a fist and his eyes concentrated on a single blade taller than the rest. He had finished all the projects he wanted to do, his ammunition supply was plentiful, and Chopper, Franky, Luffy, and Brook had all gone on their own individual shopping expeditions. Bothering Nami, Sanji, or Zoro was out of the question.

"Longnose-kun?"

Usopp turned around. He hadn't noticed Robin sitting in the shade. Sometimes she was so quiet she simply disappeared into the background.

"Oh, hi Robin." Usopp walked over and sat down beside her.

"You seem quite down today. Why is that so?"

"Just bored." Usopp shrugged.

"Ah." Robin nodded and resumed to chipping away at the hunk of stone she held in her hand with a chisel the size of a fountain pen. After some minutes of silence, she spoke up again. "Longnose-kun, where did Sogeking go to after the events at Enies Lobby?"

"Soge…king?" Usopp looked at her in surprise. "Why?"

"I never did get the opportunity to thank him properly for speaking to me in the Sea Train." Robin smiled. "Do you think he has forgiven me for nearly breaking his spine?"

"Yeah. I'm sure he has." Usopp nodded vigorously.

"That's reassuring to know." Robin spent another silent minute chipping at the stone. "How did you meet Sogeking, Longnose-kun?"

"Well…" Usopp grinned. "I was all alone in a dark forest, with a whole legion of vampire-apes surrounding me. The only weapon I had left was a plastic spoon, and my right leg was broken. All seemed lost! The apes advanced on me, their evil red eyes glinting evilly! But all of the sudden, a caped shadow flew in front of me and used his bare fists to beat off the vampire-apes! That was Sogeking. He saved my life." Usopp paused to glance at Robin. She was patiently waiting for him to continue.

"He saved my life." Usopp repeated. "Sogeking helped me out of the dark forest, and he told me that if I ever need any help in any dire situations, he would appear immediately no matter where I was to save me again. Sogeking is a very reliable man, you see."

"Hm." Robin said thoughtfully. "And his current whereabouts?"

"I'm sure Sogeking is somewhere nearby, ready to help us if we need it." Usopp nodded confidently.

"Tell him I said 'thank you'…" Robin stood up. She wordlessly handed the stone she had been working on to Usopp and walked away.

Usopp looked down at the little stone in his palm. It had been carved to a near perfect likeness of Sogeking's mask.

***

AN: Aye yup.  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	21. Chopper and Luffy

AN: So I'm working on a series of parodies, and have no idea when to start posting the chapters. When, oh when~?

***

Title: Midnight Teddy Bear  
Characters: Luffy and Chopper  
Rating: K+ (for Chopper's naughty naughty language)  
Summary: Chopper has a nightmare.  
A/N: This one was a bit too short for my liking. Eh.

***

There was darkness everywhere, engulfing the poor little reindeer-doctor. Tentacles the color of evil wrapped themselves around Chopper's vulnerable form, squeezing tightly. Chopper screamed but no breath would escape his constricted throat. The tentacles squeezed tighter to the point where Chopper's eyes were bugging out.

He woke up in a snap, relieved for a split second, thinking that his nightmare was over. But Chopper felt something rubbery constricting his body.

"Octopus!" Chopper half-wheezed, half-gasped. He began thrashing and squirming, trying to get whatever was hugging him to let go.

"Hmmglahhh…" whatever was holding onto Chopper smacked his lips and yawned. Chopper realized who was squeezing him too tightly like, of all things, a teddy bear.

"Luffy! You bastard! Let me go!" Chopper tried to free his limbs, but with no success.

Luffy muttered something in his sleep and hugged Chopper tighter, smothering the reindeer (and not a tanuki!) into his chest.

"MMMFFFF!" Chopper yelled, his voice muffled. He tried to morph into Heavy Point and even Walk Point, but Luffy simply adjusted his arms with each shift. With a sigh of defeat, Chopper turned back into Brain Point and allowed Luffy to hug him tighter.

Chopper would have to wait until morning for his freedom.

***

AN: Hm... I appear to have fallen into a deep hole. What friendship pairing shall I do next? (I'm trying to save Nami/Robin last since that's the one I want to write most)  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	22. Franky and Zoro

AN: Hm... I really should stop making Franky cry whenever I write about him...

***

Title: Who's Annoying?  
Characters: Zoro and Franky, and mentions of the entire crew  
Rating: K+  
Summary: So… who's the one being annoying, exactly?  
A/N: I couldn't come up with anything, so I used a random word generator and got "annoying". Eh, it works.

***

Franky tapped his feet to an imaginary rhythm only he could hear. He pounded his fists together with the beat and bobbed his head up and down. It was time to dance.

"SUPAAAAAAA!" Franky roared, asserting his super-ness to the ocean. "Ow! Feel the beat! Ow! Ow!"

The rest of the crew had become accustomed to his impromptu dances by then and simply went on with their business. Usopp, even below deck in the Solder Docking Systems, could hear Franky's shouting. Chopper plugged up his sensitive ears with cotton in the infirmary, and Sanji caught the pancake he had flipped up into the air with no problem. Nami gritted her teeth but concentrated on her map and Robin was too drawn into a book she was reading to notice Franky's singing. Both Brook and Luffy paused their board game to laugh when they heard Franky but resumed their game nonetheless. Zoro was fast asleep.

"Dance! Dance! OW!" Franky continued wiggling his butt around in a rather provocative manner. Just then, Zoro gave off an ear-splitting snore that echoed off the ship. Franky stopped dancing and gaped at Zoro. He stomped up to the sleeping marimo and nudged him with a toe.

"Oi! Stop snoring, Zoro-bro! You're ruining my dance vibes!" Franky said loudly. Zoro's left eye opened slowly and glared at Franky.

"What the hell do you want? Let me sleep, dammit." Zoro grumbled. He yawned loudly to prove his point.

"Now _that _is annoying." Franky said, pointing at Zoro.

"What?"

"Those weird sounds you make when you're asleep. You sound like a drunk elephant trying to drink hot coffee."

"What kind of stupid comparison is that?" Zoro growled.

"Annoy-ing." Franky articulated.

"Shut up!" Zoro yelled, now fully awake. "You're the one being annoying!"

"EHHH?!?" Franky's jaw dropped in disbelief.

"Your dancing is so obnoxious and loud, I'm surprised I can even sleep with all the noise you're making!" Zoro jabbed a finger at Franky's chest.

Franky's bottom lip quivered.

"Oi…" Zoro noticed the subtle movement.

"I-I'm not crying, you i-i-idiot!" Franky hiccupped, rubbing his eyes furiously. Zoro backed off, unsure what to do.

"It's s-something in my eye!" Franky stubbornly said.

"You're crying." Zoro bluntly pointed out.

"B-B-BWAAAAAAH!" Franky bawled. "YOU DIDN'T HURT MY F-FEELINGS AT A-ALL, ZORO-BRO!"

"Gah! I'm sorry!" Zoro said frantically. "Sorry, sorry!"

Franky sniffled and looked at Zoro suspiciously. "You really mean that?"

Zoro sighed. "…Yeah. Come on, let's go inside for some sake."

"And some cola." Franky added in, wiping his snot away.

"Yeah. Cola and sake." Zoro half-smiled as they went into the kitchen to bother Sanji for drinks.

***

AN: I totally want to see Franky if he filled his fridge with Zoro's sake.  
Next will be Sanji/Brook. Maybe. Probably.  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	23. Sanji and Brook

AN: Heh heh :3

***

Title: Emergency Food Supply  
Characters: Sanji and Brook  
Rating: K+  
Summary: The Strawhats have a new emergency food supply… oh, not that way, you sickos!  
A/N: Brook is such a versatile character to work with, I'm surprised other people haven't taken advantage of it yet.

***

Sanji was royally pissed off. He didn't even want Brook to come with him, but the damn skeleton insisted on following along. Sanji just wanted to gather some wild edible plants in the forest they had stopped at since there wasn't a town. It turned out there wasn't anything remotely edible except for a few mushrooms he found. But Chopper and Usopp refused to eat any kind of fungus, so that wasn't an option. The failed search for food wouldn't have been so frustrating if Brook hadn't gotten them lost after he ran off the trail when he thought he heard a bear running towards them (it turned out it was just a damn rabbit).

"I believe we are lost, Sanji-san."

"Ya think?"

Sanji wasn't supposed to get lost. He never got lost. Stupid morons like the marimo got lost. Sanji sighed. He wished Nami-san or Robin-chan were with them, since they had the best sense of direction out of all the morons. Actually, they had the most sense of _anything _in the crew.

"What shall we do now?"

"We? _You _need to shut up so I can think of a way to get out of this damn forest."

They had lost the trail long ago. Unluckily for them, the forest was on flat-leveled ground so Sanji couldn't tell which direction they were going.

"Huff… puff… Sanji-san, my bones are quite worn out from the long trek."

"Shitty skeleton… fine, fine. Let's sit down here to rest." Sanji and Brook found an overturned log and sat down. Sanji rummaged in his pockets for a cigarette and lit it up, the smoke relaxing him only by a fraction.

"Shit… it'll take at least another two hours to get outta this place." Sanji muttered. "Brook! Don't eat those mushrooms, they're poisonous!"

"Eeeek!" Brook shrieked, throwing the mushroom away and flapping his hands.

"Sheez… what a sissy…" Sanji grinded his teeth on his cigarette as his stomach began growling. If he knew he would be spending a few hours in a forest that morning, he would have eaten more breakfast.

"Sanji-san, would you like some food?"

"We don't have any food."

"Yes, we do."

"What?" Sanji looked at Brook. Brook grinned and reached into his afro, his hand rummaging around in the poof of hair.

"You see? I hid them here yesterday since Luffy-san ate the rest of them." Brook pulled out six candy bars from his afro as Sanji's eye widened in both disbelief and amusement.

"What else do you have in there?" Sanji grinned.

"Well… there _was _a little songbird nesting in here last night, but she had already flown away." Brook said sadly.

"Heh. So it turns out your afro isn't so useless after all." Sanji's grin grew wider and he allowed himself to chuckle. He accepted the candy bar Brook offered to him and quickly tore off the crinkly wrapper. The chocolate was slightly melted, but it was still good.

"Oh! I'm so happy you think that! Happy days! Happy days!" Brook sang to the side, swaying side to side. His jaw was already covered with chocolate.

"Yeah, yeah." Sanji smiled gruffly. "Come on, Brook. Let's get out of this shitty forest." Sanji and Brook stood up and continued on their way, chewing on candy bars and discussing what else Brook could hide in his massive hair.

***

AN: The next chapter is a SURPRISE!!! *0* You'll never know what hit you.  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	24. Bon Clay and Robin

AN: BAM!  
This chapter is in honor of Bentham, more commonly known as Mr. 2 Bon Clay, former member of Baroque Works and hero of Impel Down. THIS IS FOR YOU, BON-CHAN!!! TAT

***

Title: The Best and Worst of First Impressions  
Characters: Bon Clay and Robin  
Rating: K+  
Summary: Miss All-Sunday meets a very strange man-woman while recruiting for Baroque Works.  
A/N: Just taking a little break from the confines of the Thousand Sunny and going back to the past. I was originally going to post this as a separate story but decided against it, so this is just going to pass as a special chapter…

***

Miss All-Sunday was mildly disappointed. Sort of.

The town Crocodile had sent her to was incredibly bland and empty, with only a few people milling around and rusty old shops lining the streets. The street running through the town was dusty and there were several stray dogs running about. The place was so boring, Miss All-Sunday had already forgotten its name (which was no doubt as boring as itself).

People gawked at her as she walked through. The men stared after her with wide eyes and the women glared at her with evident distaste. Miss All-Sunday didn't blame them. Crocodile had insisted on her wearing a stark-white fur coat and a revealing outfit underneath consisting of a corset and a skirt, saying it was necessary to not only _act _intimidating; one had to _look_ intimidating too. He had allowed her to wear the cowboy hat. She refused to explain why she wanted to. That was her own personal business, not his.

"UWAAAH! FREAK!"

Miss All-Sunday paused. The shout had come from behind her, but it wasn't directed at her. There was a loud bang and a crash and a body flew over her head, falling down into the dirt and sending dogs running away. The man's face was bloody and he groaned weakly from where he lay.

"Wait, wh-what are you- GAH!"

Another body flew by her. It hit the side of a general store, cracking the wall. Miss All-Sunday decided to turn around.

She had read about okama plenty of times before. They were flamboyant, cheerful, and incredibly gay. The one who stood some distance down the street fit the textbook description. His bony face was slathered with colorful makeup and his masculine figure was covered by a bright pink, flowing skirt and a V-neck blouse embroidered with little swans. He was wearing a pair of ballet slippers and a rosy pink jacket loosely over his shoulders.

"You can never harm me! Why? Because, I AM AN OKAMAAAA~!" the man sang, spinning in place.

Miss All-Sunday really began to wonder why Crocodile had sent her here. The okama noticed her and grinned, showing off pearly white teeth of an unusually long length.

"Hellooooo~!" he said, dancing up to her and grabbing her hand in a firm handshake. "I don't think I've seen you around here before!"

"No, you haven't." Miss All-Sunday's face was a blank mask.

"Then you must be new to these dried up parts! I would give you a tour of this town, but I don't live here! Gahahaha!" the okama laughed cheerfully.

Miss All-Sunday merely nodded and turned to walk away. She didn't have time to mess around with an okama.

"Wait! I never got your name, you mysterious lady with the furry jacket!" the okama jumped in front of her. Robin's left eye subtly twitched.

"Miss All-Sunday." She said, obeying Crocodile's orders to use only her code name.

"Stop jooooking aroooound~! The okama guffawed loudly, flapping a hand at her. "What a strange name! Oh, well, then I'll just call you Sunday-chan!"

"I'm in a bit of a hurry, okama-san…"

"Okama-san??? Gahahaha! My name is Bentham!"

"Very well…"

"YOU!" both of them turned around to see one of the men yanking himself up on his feet. He spat blood to the side and stumbled towards them.

Bentham laughed. "What a strange bunch of men! So resilient! Only okama can be so resilient like a cactus... or something like that. Okama Kenpo!" He launched himself into the air, spinning rapidly. Miss All-Sunday calmly watched on as the okama viciously kicked the man in the chest, sending him rocketing all the way down the street until he was out of sight.

"You seem to be quite a strong fighter." Miss All-Sunday stated matter-of-factly once Bentham landed back on the ground.

"That's not aaaaaall~!" the okama sang, spinning on one foot. "I like you, Sunday-chan, so I'll show you my super special secret ability!

"…Devil Fruit?"

"Allow me to demonstrate!" Bentham lightly touched Miss All-Sunday's cheek with his right hand, making her shudder inconspicuously. Then, in a blink of an eye, two Miss All-Sundays stood face to face.

"Isn't it a woooonderful ability???" the imitation Miss All-Sunday sang, the joyful grin looking unnatural and rather creepy on her normally stoic face. "The Mane Mane no Mi! Oh, what a fabulous fruit!"

"I suppose."

"You suppose? Stop jooooking arooound! You know, I think you're too stiff, Sunday-chan." Bentham tapped his cheek with his left hand and resumed his normal okama face. "You need to lighten up!"

"There is no time for relaxation." Miss All-Sunday said robotically.

"Then just laugh!"

Miss All-Sunday stiffened. "Laughing doesn't work."

"Sure it does! Gahahaha! Come on, laugh with me!"

"I'd rather not."

"Sunday-chaaaan!" Bentham pouted. "You're so uptight! You know what, I'm bored now. I think I'll spin. Yeah, I'll just spin while you work on laughing, you dried up cardboard box." True to his word, he began twirling in place on one foot with a bored expression on his colorful face.

Miss All-Sunday internally scowled, but it felt fake. The okama should have been getting on her nerves but she was strangely intrigued by his gay attitude. He was just so _happy, _something she hasn't felt in who knows how long… plus, he was an exceptional fighter with Devil Fruit powers.

And before she knew it, she was telling him about her recruitment mission for Baroque Works.

"Hmm? Baroque Works, eh?" Bentham tapped his chin thoughtfully, ceasing his spinning. Miss All-Sunday silently nodded. "Okay! I'm in! Yaaaay! Now we can hang out together even more, Sunday-chan!"

"What do you mean by that?"

"Well, we're friends now, right?"

"Only business associates."

"No. We're friends, Sunday-chan, and nothing is going to change that. I swear on the Okama Way." Bentham said stubbornly. Miss All-Sunday hid the smallest of smiles as she and her new okama associate walked away from the town and back to her ship.

And even though Nico Robin knew Crocodile would probably disapprove about her recruitment choice, she didn't regret taking Bentham along with her back to Arabasta. After all, no one else had truly called her a friend in twenty years.

***

AN: Bon Clay is just about the coolest ex-villain in the series. Robin is the coolest ex-villain_ess_.  
And anyone catch the couple Jaguar D Saul references?  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	25. Nami and Usopp

AN: I didn't really like this one. I dunno, I guess I just didn't try hard enough.

***

Title: Democracy  
Characters: Nami and Usopp, and bits of Zoro and Chopper  
Rating: K+  
Summary: Usopp tries to rebel, but with little success.  
A/N: Nami is like the Queen/Empress/Pimp/whatever of the ship. Someone beside Robin's gotta stand up to her at some point, right?

***

The way Usopp saw it, their little ragtag crew of nine was run by a dictatorship.

Nami was the dictator. Obviously.

Even though she wasn't the captain, she was the one who ordered everyone about and beat them over their heads when they didn't respond fast enough. Usopp sometimes envied Robin. He wondered what it was like to eternally be in Nami's good terms.

"ZORO! GET OFF YOUR LAZY ASS AND DO THE LAUNDRY!"

"MAKE ME, WOMAN!"

Usopp winced and looked away as Zoro, the Pirate Hunter with a bounty of over 100 million and the man who was stronger than a rhino, was beaten to submission by a slender girl who didn't even possess any superhuman strength.

But sometimes the dictator decided to be nice. Sort of.

"Chopper, you're so cute when you're pissed off!"

"Shut up! Shut up, bitch! I'm not happy at all that you think that! Asshole!"

Usopp didn't really understand Chopper's logic sometimes. After a nasty incident involving Nami, Luffy, a giant squid, and a barrel of molasses, Usopp decided something had to be done about Nami's tyranny over the Strawhat Pirates. He ducked into his workshop and began scribbling away on a blank sheet of paper. The next morning, he presented his plans to her.

"What's this?" Nami squinted at the paper.

"It's the plans for a democratic government system!" Usopp pointed out the thick paragraphs of writing he had labored over so painstakingly. He had stayed up all night reading Robin's books on government systems, too.

"And why are you showing me this?" Nami narrowed her eyes in suspicion. Usopp inhaled and set his jaw.

"I think it's time everyone on this crew is freed from your tyranny of bankruptcy, Nami!" Usopp quickly said.

"Robin and Sanji-kun don't seem to mind my debts." Nami smirked.

"Because Robin doesn't even _have _debts and Sanji is too busy fawning over you!" Usopp said in exasperation. "If we follow these democratic guidelines, our crew can live in peace and harmony with no interest or fees! Or head wounds!"

"Nice try, Usopp. We're not a country. We're a pirate crew." Nami bluntly pointed out. She handed the paper back to him.

"...Oh. Right." Usopp hung his head and walked away.

Why, oh why, did Nami have to point out the technicalities?

***

AN: If Nami uses the punches she uses on the boys, she would be invincible in battle. Or she could just use her Happiness Punch.  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	26. Franky and Brook

AN: Yeah, I know that last chapter wasn't really nakamaship. My bad. :(

***

Title: The World is Weird  
Characters: Franky and Brook  
Rating: K+  
Summary: Brook asks Franky some rather odd questions.  
A/N: These two… need more love. Seriously.

***

"Ah, Franky-san." Brook caught sight of Franky polishing the lion figurehead, which Luffy had drooled all over earlier in his sleep. "There you are."

"You need something, Skeleton-bro?" Franky asked.

"Yes. I have been meaning to ask you a question that has been nagging at the back of my mind." Brook said.

"Fire away." Franky said absentmindedly, flicking a piece of chewed-up meat off the metal.

"How can you still be alive if most of your body parts replaced with metal?"

Franky stood up and lifted up his sunglasses. "Shouldn't I be asking you that?"

"No, because I am a skeleton, and that is a different thing from a cyborg."

"Where's your logic in that, Skeleton-bro?"

"Quite frankly, I have no idea." Brook said cheerfully.

Franky sighed. "Look, we all know that you eat, drink, and cry. So that obviously means I can too."

"Don't forget poop!"

"Eh… yeah. Isn't this world weird enough without those stupid questions about technicalities?" Franky stared into Brook's empty eye sockets that still somehow retained their vision abilities.

"Yes. I suppose you're right… Zoro and Sanji are quite weird." Brook mused.

"I WAS REFERRING TO US!"

"Eh??? Really?!? But Zoro's hair is green and Sanji's eyebrow is so curly!" Brook said.

"And that's weird compared to a cyborg and a living skeleton?" Franky raised an eyebrow in disbelief.

"Yes."

"… sure, why not." Franky threw up his hands. He lowered his massive arms and thought for a second. "You know, I like the way you think, Skeleton-bro. It's pretty super."

"Why, thank you! Yohohoho! I am honored that you have said such a thing to me!" Brook bowed.

"Well, let's go let Zoro-bro and Cook-bro know how weird they are." Franky grinned. The two tallest members of the crew walked away from the drool-encrusted figurehead to bother their fellow crewmates about their oddities.

After all, Franky and Brook were practically normal compared to them.

***

AN: That last sentence is supposed to be a mix of sarcasm and joking. Because Franky and Brook are super eccentric in so many ways.  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	27. Chopper and Nami

AN: I felt slightly awkward writing this chapter. Slightly. Which totally proves I have a little pervert inside of me (like how Robin can be a tickle monster sometimes) 8D

***

Title: Womanly Issues  
Characters: Nami and Chopper  
Rating: T (only if you're squeamish-ish…)  
Summary: Nami has a problem, and she wants Chopper to help.  
A/N: Apologies if Nami seems OOC here, which she probably is. I'm awful.

***

Chopper smiled as he placed his sixteenth Rumble Ball in the plastic dish. There. That would last him for a long time, and now he had more time to work on making cough medicine for Sanji. Chopper hopped off the high stool, carefully holding the plastic dish in his little arms.

"Oh, Chopper." Nami appeared in the doorway of the infirmary. "There you are."

"Is there something wrong, Nami?" Chopper asked.

"I needed to ask you something important." Nami said, fidgeting. "You know gynecology, right?"

"EEEEHHHHH?!?" Chopper shrieked. The plastic dish fell to the ground and Rumble Balls rolled around but he didn't notice. His fur had puffed up to the point where he looked as if he had just come out of a dryer and his eyes were as wide as a deer's caught in front of the headlights.

"Yeah. Gynecology." Nami nodded. "You see, I haven't had my period yet, and it's about my time of the month."

"A-And what do y-you need m-me to do about it?" Chopper trembled, backing away.

"Oh, I don't know. I might have an infection or something. Maybe I'm pregnant, even." Nami casually said, checking her nails. "You're the doctor on this ship, so naturally I'd come to you, right?"

"B-but I'm unfamiliar with the human female anatomy!" Chopper blurted out.

"But still, can you check…?"

"EEEEEYAAAAAAAAH!" Chopper screamed. He dove underneath the table and curled up, trembling. Then he heard Nami laughing. Chopper cautiously looked over his shoulder. "What's so funny?!?"

"I'm just kidding with you, Chopper!" Nami laughed. "You should've seen the look on your face!"

"Bitch! That wasn't funny at all! Bitch!" Chopper giggled nervously beneath his hooves, crawling out from the table.

"Haha! Gynecology! Ha! As if I'd let you do that!" Nami laughed, rubbing the top of Chopper's head affectionately.

"Ha! As if I'd even be willing to! Haha! Ha!" Chopper giggled. "Bitch! I'm not laughing! You bitch!"

"Okay. I'm done kidding with you." Nami wiped a tear away from her eye. "But seriously. I'm here because I think Robin might be pregnant…"

"EH?!? ROBEEEEEEN!!!" Chopper ran out of the infirmary, screaming along the way.

"… I guess I shouldn't have told him that…" Nami quietly exited the room to stop Chopper.

***

AN: Don't worry, don't worry, she's kidding! Sheesh!  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	28. Luffy and Zoro

AN: This pairing is so incredibly canon, it can be incredibly boring in certain circumstances. That's probably true in my case (since _everyone_ writes Zoro+Luffy), but hey.  
**8-7-10- fixed Zoro's dialogue!**

-X-

Title: A Bedtime Story  
Characters: Luffy and Zoro  
Rating: T (INTENSE PORNO SCENE... nah, just kidding. It's only mild language)  
Summary: Zoro tells Luffy a bedtime story.  
A/N: The long-awaited Luffy and Zoro, I present to you.

-X-

"Nyaaaaah, Zoro. Are you awake?" Luffy whispered loudly, poking his head up in the observation deck. Zoro woke up with a start and scowled.

"Now I am. Whaddya want, Luffy?" Zoro yawned.

"I can't sleep."

"Go bother the ero-cook."

"I already did." Luffy stepped into the moonlight to show off the fresh bruise on his face. "See? He was really pissed off."

"Hmph." Zoro closed his eyes and was just about to doze off again when Luffy suddenly jumped right on top of him as if his first mate were a trampoline.

"Nami's gonna be mad if she sees you sleeping on your shift again!" Luffy chanted, hopping up and down on Zoro's stomach.

"Shi-oof! Fuck! Geroff!" Zoro quickly rolled over. "If you can't sleep, what the hell do you want me to do about it?"

"Let's play a game so I get really tired!" Luffy said excitedly, still hopping up and down on the ground.

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

"Eeeeeehhh! You're no fun, Zoro!" Luffy pouted. He headbutted Zoro's already sore stomach.

"Quit it!" Zoro wheezed, clutching his battered abdomen. "Dammit, your head is hard!"

"Tell me a bedtime story then." Luffy said defiantly. He planted his bottom firmly on the hardwood floor and looked at Zoro expectantly.

"… Geh, fine." Zoro sighed. His forehead wrinkled with the effort to think up of something. "Uh, okay. Once upon a time there was, uh, a magical kingdom… that was magic."

"Ooooh!" Luffy's eyes were sparkling and he leaned forward. "Magic?"

"Yeah. Magic. And, uh, this kingdom was ruled by…" Zoro suddenly grinned with inspiration, "the Prince of Retardia!"

"I've heard that name before." Luffy frowned.

"No you haven't. _Anyways_, the Prince of Retardia was possibly the most retarded man in the country, even though he was their ruler." Zoro continued, ignoring Luffy's comment. "He was an idiotic pervert, a hissy perfectionist, and, uh, did I mention the most damn retarded man anyone had ever seen?" Luffy smiled wide, enjoying Zoro's story. "One day the Prince of Retardia came upon uh… the Bitch of Witches."

"The Witch of Bitches?"

"No, the Bitch of Witches."

"Bitch of Bitches?"

"No, the Bi- you know what, forget it. The Bitch of Witches, or whatever you wanna call her, was an incredibly greedy bitch who always stole the good, hard-working people's money for no damn reason. She also nagged a lot."

"Oh-hoooo! This is getting good!" Luffy grinned.

"The Prince of Retardia, being the crappy retarded man he is, fell for the Bitch of Witches. The Bitch of Witches immediately beat the perverted crap out of him and robbed him clean. Of course, though, the Prince of Retardia didn't really give a damn care and simply bled to death on the ground, still fantasizing about the Bitch of Witches' oversized chest that gave her back problems."

"Aw, he died." Luffy's face drooped.

"The Bitch of Witches traveled across the crappy country, stealing money and beating the crap out of people, when she met the… Green Knight."

"Another hero!" Luffy's face lifted up again.

"The Green Knight was the hero of the land, and was, uh, the strongest man ever besides that. He was valiant, brave, and pretty fuckin' strong." Zoro paused, grinning. "The Green Knight and the Bitch of Witches began fighting. Of course, the Green Knight won by a landslide. And the people lived happily ever after with no interest fees. The end."

"Thanks for the story, Zoro!" Luffy immediately fell over and went to sleep before he even hit the ground, a snot bubble inflating and deflating from his nose as he snored loudly. Zoro huffed in satisfaction and leaned against the wall. He closed his eyes and drifted to sleep.

Then all of hell broke loose the next morning when Luffy repeated Zoro's story to the rest of the crew.

-X-

AN: Lawlz, Zoro has issues. All of them should go to therapy.  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	29. Usopp and Sanji

AN: Wooohaaaawooohaaaa... 8D

***

Title: The Death of Snowsopp  
Characters: Sanji and Usopp, and Chopper  
Rating: K+  
Summary: Usopp builds a snowman, and Sanji decides to ruin the fun.  
A/N: Written at 2:15 AM, day before a huge test. I'm gonna fail, fo sho.

***

"COMPLETE!" Usopp bellowed to the clouds, waving his arms around his life-sized snow sculpture of himself. It was a little bit on the pudgy side, but how else was Snowsopp (Usopp's name for it) going to stand upright?

"COOOL!" Chopper's tongue waved like a little tsunami in excitement, his eyes bugging out. "MAKE ME NOW, USOPP!"

"Not yet, my dear reindeer." Usopp chuckled at his little pun. "Snowsopp needs one final touch."

Since the snow obeyed gravity every time Usopp attempted to make a nose for Snowsopp, there was no other way of creating his signature nose. Usopp reached into his coat pocket and pulled out a long, thin carrot he had peeled himself.

"There!" Usopp said happily, sticking the carrot smack dab in Snowsopp's face. "All done!"

"EVEN MORE COOOOL!" Chopper said in awe.

"Oi." Sanji walked up to them. "When are you coming back on the ship? It's about time we left."

"Sanji… Sanji Sanji Sanji…" Usopp chuckled, shaking his head. "We can't go until you say HELLO TO SNOWSOPP!!" He jumped aside, framing Snowsopp with his arms dramatically.

"Oh." Sanji reached up and plucked the carrot from Snowsopp's face. Like a chain reaction, the snow around the carrot crumbled, causing the entire sculpture to collapse into a pile of powdery snow. "I needed a carrot to make a fried vegetable dish. Thanks, Usopp."

"HEEEHHH!!!" Usopp wheezed in horror, staring at what used to be his creation.

"SANJI YOU BASTARD!" Chopper shrieked, immediately latching onto Sanji's leg with his teeth. "YOU KILLED SNOWSOPP!"

"It would have melted later anyways." Sanji shrugged. He patted Usopp, who was looking down at the ground dejectedly, on his back. "Come on. Let's go back for some hot cocoa, okay?"

"With marshmallows?" Usopp eyed Sanji suspiciously.

"Yeah. The big kind." Sanji nodded.

"…Okay. But I'm still mad!" Usopp sputtered hastily.

"Sure, Usopp, whatever you say." Sanji grinned. The two of them began their walk back to the ship, Chopper still biting onto Sanji's leg and growling viciously.

***

AN: Next... Chopper/Brook, perhaps? Or Luffy/Brook?  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	30. Chopper and Brook

AN: I really need to be studying right now. But, alas, inspiration comes at the worst moments.

***

Title: Bone Eaters  
Characters: Chopper and Brook  
Rating: K+  
Summary: Brook needs help, and Chopper is the only one who can.  
A/N: Oooh, what a dramatic summary.

***

Chopper happily trotted down the near-empty streets in Walk Point, carrying a bag of freshly picked herbs on his back. He would have preferred to be in Brain Point or Heavy Point, but he didn't want to cause a fuss if anyone saw him.

Then for a split second, Chopper's sensitive ears picked up a curious sound. It sounded like… shrieking?

Just to be on the safe side, Chopper wandered closer to the source of the sound. After many twists and turns in the streets, he turned a corner and saw Brook on the ground. Surrounded by a mass of dogs. Who were gnawing on his limbs.

"Ah, that tickles yet hurts at the same time!" Brook cried, pinned down by a bulky Labrador that was chewing on a rib.

"EEEEHHH!!! BROOK!" Chopper shrieked, immediately running forward. A terrier broke free from the mob and yapped at Chopper warningly.

"Oh, Chopper-san! Hello!" Brook managed to wave before a shaggy mutt began slobbering all over his hand. "As you can see, I seem to be in quite a predicament!"

"HOW CAN YOU BE SO CALM?!?" Chopper yelled, trying to find an opening in the thick pile of dogs happily chewing on the skeleton.

"Well, I do like dogs." Brook said thoughtfully.

"EVEN WHEN THEY'RE EATING YOU?!?"

"Technically, Chopper-san, they are not eating me. They are merely gnawing on my bones." Brook pointed out. "But perhaps you can ask the dogs to get off of me? My back is feeling stiff."

"O-okay…" Chopper cautiously edged forward. "He-hello? Dogs?"

"Muh?" the terrier that had yapped at Chopper looked up.

"C-can you get off my friend…?"

"Moh." The terrier growled, turning back around.

"Pleaaaaase? He's over eighty years old, you know…"

"Gerah?!?" A large hound barked in horror, letting go of Brook's femur. "Gerah! Gerah!"

"Nmraaaaao!" The rest of the dogs howled, quickly releasing Brook and running away.

"I don't know if I should be offended or thankful." Brook said, dusting himself off and examining his bones. "Hm, a bottle of milk should set me up straight again. Thank you, Doctor-san!"

"… YOU'RE NOT WELCOME ONE BIT, YOU BASTARD!" Chopper blushed, pulling his hat rim low over his eyes.

***

AN: Yes, those dogs do make strange sounds.  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	31. Robin and Zoro

AN: This chapter isn't very nakamashippy... more like one-sided, since Robin is picking on a helpless, unaware Zoro.

***

Title: Mind Tricks  
Characters: Zoro and Robin  
Rating: K+  
Summary: Robin messes with Zoro's head and takes advantage of his ability to get ridiculously lost.  
A/N: This chapter probably doesn't make a lot of sense, either.

***

Zoro scratched his head. He scratched it again and turned around. And turned around again. No, he was sure that shop wasn't there the last time he passed by. And that pole didn't look familiar.

_Scratch scratch._

Zoro was lost. Not that he would admit it, of course.

"Oi, which way's the harbor?" Zoro caught the attention of a passerby. The man wordlessly pointed down the street. "Thanks." Zoro hurried down. But, for some reason, he ended up in the exact same spot he had stopped the man. What the hell? He hadn't even made a turn!

Yep. He was definitely lost. _Not _lost, I mean.

"Damn…" Zoro muttered, looking around. He took another few steps and realized he was facing a brick wall. How'd that get there?

"Lost?"

Zoro whipped around. Robin was standing behind him, an amused expression on her face. "Oh, it's you. No. I'm not lost. I think _you _are."

"Perhaps I am. Then will you show me the way back to the ship?"

"Eh… that way." Zoro pointed at the brick wall. Robin's eyebrows raised half a centimeter.

"Am I supposed to climb it?"

"Yup."

"…Very well then. Thank you, Swordsman-san." Robin summoned a chain of arms and pulled herself smoothly over the wall. Zoro turned around, only to face yet another brick wall.

"Huh?" After spinning around some, he finally found the street. He quickly walked down, sure he would find the harbor. Eventually.

Someone tapped his shoulder. Zoro turned around, but no one was there. Then he felt a slight tug at his feet. He looked down, but there was nothing.

"Must be my imagination…" Zoro muttered. He took another few steps forward and promptly tripped over the curb. "Gah! Dammit!"

There was another tap at his shoulder.

"Whaddya want?" Zoro whipped his head around. But there wasn't anyone behind him. Growling, Zoro got back up and found himself right in front of a store window. Where the hell did that come from?!?

_Tap tap_.

"Shit!" Zoro growled, quickly pulling out a sword and slashing behind him. Nothing but air. Then his trousers were suddenly yanked down, exposing his marimo-green boxers.

"Argh!" Zoro pulled his pants up, thankful the street was empty except for a woman walking the opposite direction far down the road. Cursing under his breath, Zoro tucked his trousers under his haramaki and sheathed his sword.

_Tap tap._

"What the hell?!?" Zoro spun around again and again, but there simply wasn't anyone there. When he stopped spinning, he seemed to be at the edge of a forest. Hm, maybe he teleported. Zoro gaped at the line of trees, utterly confused as how he got there.

_Tap-_

"Hah!" Zoro reacted more quickly this time, slapping at his shoulder. He thought he felt a bit of flesh, but when he grabbed at it there was nothing. Zoro narrowed his eyes suspiciously and turned to walk. And promptly crashed into the side of a building that _seriously _wasn't there before. Zoro glanced around him and realized he was back where he started. Huh.

_Tap tap tap tap tap._

Whoever was pestering him poked his shoulder in quick succession. Zoro cringed. Just to be sure, he checked his reflection in a store window, turning this way and that to make sure there wasn't a squirrel on his head or something. Nothing.

Then his pants fell down again.

"What the hell?!?" Zoro yelled, earning a nervous glance from a small child crossing the street with a lollipop in his hand. Zoro glared at the child, sending him sprinting away from the strange pant-less man yelling at no one. Spitting curses at rapid-fire, Zoro kept a fist firmly holding onto his pants as he walked on, to be on the safe side.

And then he walked over the edge of the pier that appeared out of nowhere and fell into the water.

"GAH!" Zoro roared, spitting water out out his mouth. He thrashed in the water out of anger, when something tapped his shoulder. This time, when he twisted his neck around, there was a hand cheerfully waving at him.

"So you finally found your way back, Swordsman-san?" Robin called from the ship, smiling down at Zoro.

"Go to hell, woman!" Zoro yelled back. Robin laughed and created a network of arms to pull Zoro out of the water.

***

AN: Zoro's so silly. He should be thankful that Robin led him back. :D  
As an explanation as to how Zoro "teleported" all over the place... he was THAT lost.  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	32. Franky and Nami

AN: Don't forget to check out Treinta Fleur, the 30-theme challenge that I took!

***

Title: Super Makeover  
Characters: Franky and Nami, and a splash of Luffy  
Rating: K+  
Summary: Nami gets back at Franky in the cruelest way possible  
A/N: It was hard to think up of something for these two. And it's more like an indirect nakamaship thing, since Nami made Franky happy unintentionally.

***

Nami tiptoed into Franky's workshop, eyes narrowed with malicious intent. The idiotic (and perverted) cyborg had spilt cola all over Nami's favorite shirt that morning, and Nami wasn't about to let him get off so easily.

"Bznaaack…" Nami flinched, thinking Franky had woken up. No… he just snored. What a strange way of snoring. She reached behind her and brought out her makeup and hair-care kit. Nami _was _planning to use it on Robin (who seriously needed to do something about those shadows beneath her eyes) but this was a more serious matter that went beyond money since it involved Nami's favorite shirt being ruined.

Snickering rather evilly, Nami stood behind Franky (who was dozing with his face on the table) and opened the kit.

***

"GWAAAAAAAH!" Franky bellowed from his workshop. Nami, who was sunbathing beside Robin, smiled triumphantly. Robin glanced at Nami knowingly but didn't say anything. While the rest of the crew clamored around, slightly panicked about Franky's roar, the door to his workshop burst open and Franky slowly stepped outside into the sunlight, his head bowed down. Everyone froze. Nami put on her best poker face, holding back her laughter.

Franky's hair was dyed an incredibly neon yellow color that hurt everyone's eyes. Even his sideburns had been colored, too. There was no hint of blue whatsoever.

"Franky! What happened?!?" Nami gasped, feigning shock.

"I-I don't know but…" Franky lifted his head. He was grinning widely. "This color is pretty SUPER!!" And with that, he struck his signature pose.

"WHAT?!?" Nami broke her façade but Franky didn't seem to notice.

"Oh yeah! And if I color the tips orange, I can match the Thousand Sunny's figurehead!" Franky said excitedly, dancing.

"COOOOL! I wanna color my hair that way too!" Luffy jumped up and down.

"Oi, Girlie, can we borrow your hair dyes?" Franky asked eagerly, clearly not curious as to how his hair suddenly became bright yellow. Nami could only gape at him, utterly surprised.

"Y-yeah…" Nami managed to choke out.

"Super! Let's go, Strawhat-bro!" Franky and Luffy ran off. Nami groaned in defeat as Robin chuckled in amusement.

"Oh, shut up." Nami said.

***

AN: Ayup.  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	33. Brook and Luffy

AN: There _are _chances Luffy seems OOC in this one... I'm not so sure.  
Edit: Woops! I realized Brook calls him Luffy-san, not Captain-san. That's Robin's line -fail-

***

Title: How to Ask a Lady for her Panties  
Characters: Luffy and Brook, and some Robin  
Rating: K+ (or T, if you're 4Kids and think children are too easily influenced)  
Summary: Brook teaches a thing or two about manners to Luffy. Not a good idea.  
A/N: Luffy's easily influenced. Oda said so in an SBS. HAAAAH!

***

When Luffy woke up from his nap, he was hungry. Which wasn't a good feeling at all. No, not at all.

"I NEED FOOOOD!" Luffy howled, jumping down from the lion figurehead. No one responded to his demand. Where on earth were his faithful nakama? Luffy glanced around the empty deck. "FOOOOOOD! HEY! FOOOOOD!"

He jumped across the deck to the kitchen. Sanji wasn't in there.

"Oi! Sanji! Where'd you go?" Luffy called. No answer. Shrugging, he marched across the kitchen and to the fridge. Dang it. The door was tightly locked.

"Ah, Luffy-san!" Brook ducked underneath the doorway and entered the kitchen. "Are you looking for food?"

"Yup. You got any?" Luffy asked.

"Now, now. That is not the gentlemanly way to ask for food." Brook gently chided.

"Eh?!?" Luffy said in shock.

"Yes… Luffy-san, would you like to learn how to be a gentleman such as myself?" Brook asked, picking his teeth and scratching his butt.

"No, not really. I just want foooood!" Luffy said.

"Yohohoho! I was rejected!" Brook laughed, tears welling up in his eye sockets.

"Oi, don't cry!" Luffy said hastily. "Teach me, o'wise Gentleman Brook!"

"Very well!" Brook said, somehow blinking away the tears even though he had no eyelids. "First lesson.."

Half an hour later, Luffy found Robin tending her flower garden. He walked up to her and tipped his straw hat politely, just like Brook taught him. The skeleton himself was hiding behind a doorway watching Luffy try out his newfound gentlemanly skills.

"Oi, Robin, can I see your panties?" Luffy asked bluntly.

Robin stared blankly at Luffy.

"Hm… no, I guess I did that wrong." Luffy muttered to himself. He glanced behind Robin. Brook was waving his arms wildly, mouthing something. "Eh… may… please… oh! I got it!" Luffy pounded a fist in his hand.

"Captain-san, what-"

"May I see your panties, please?" Luffy asked, grinning triumphantly. For good measure, he bowed deeply. Brook nodded approvingly, flashing him a thumbs-up.

Robin wordlessly turned around. Several arms pulled Brook out of his hiding spot and dumped him on the grassy lawn.

"I don't think you're being a good influence on Captain-san." Robin said. "Skeleton-san."

"I'm sorry!" Brook cowered. He straightened up. "But… may I see your panties?"

"No." Robin calmly said, walking away. Luffy ran up to Brook.

"Did I do it right?" Luffy asked eagerly.

"You did indeed, Luffy-san." Brook patted Luffy on the head.

***

AN: It's meant to be that Luffy didn't fully understand the whole panties thing. He was just going along with the flow.  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	34. Zoro and Usopp

AN: GOSH IT'S 12:38 A.M. AND I CAN'T SLEEP.  
Guess I shouldn't have had so much candy. Luffy is really being a bad influence on my poor, innocent soul.  
ANYWAYS.  
I think... that this is my least favorite chapter so far. Sorry if this one disappoints.

***

Title: Silly Fears  
Characters: Usopp and Zoro  
Rating: K+ (noticing a pattern here?)  
Summary: Zoro teaches Usopp how to be brave, sort of. No, not really.  
A/N: It was hard to think of something for these two without going for the obvious. Seriously.

***

Usopp found Zoro outside, polishing his swords with a cloth that smelled strongly of pears and alcohol.

"Oi, Zoro, have you seen my wrench anywhere?" Usopp asked.

"Nope." Zoro replied curtly, carefully wiping off the blade.

"Oh." Usopp turned to go when he heard Zoro hiss slightly.

"Crap." Zoro muttered. He had cut his finger accidently on Shuusui, the black blade glinting menacingly in the sunlight.

"Oi, Zoro, you okay?" Usopp asked, kneeling down beside him.

"Yeah. It's not too deep. Shuusui still has a bit of a wild side to him." Zoro said, wiping the blood off his finger.

"Jeez, I'd be scared stiff by that creepy sword." Usopp shuddered. It seemed as if the sword was glaring back at him.

"That is a mistake no person should ever make." Zoro said, looking pointedly at Usopp.

"How can you even manage that thing?" Usopp paused. "… it's staring at me."

Zoro stared at Usopp for a moment before hoisting him up to his feet. "It's time you got over your fear of Shuusui. He's as much as a crew member as I am now."

"Oh wha? Psh! It's just a sword, Zoro!" Usopp laughed nervously.

"No, he isn't." Zoro grabbed a clean cloth and tied it around Usopp's eyes.

"Uh- what are you doing?" Usopp asked.

"Don't move. If you do, you'll die." Zoro calmly said. He picked up Shuusui and held him high. "Alright? I'm throwing him up now."

"Wha- throw him- AAAAH! ZORO!" Usopp shrieked. Zoro chucked Shuusui up in the air. The sword spun momentarily before falling back to the earth point down.

It embedded itself in the deck with a twang inches away from Usopp's toes.

"See? He didn't cut you." Zoro said in satisfaction.

"Z-Zo-Zo-Zo-" Usopp stuttered, trembling violently. He tore off the blindfold. "ZORO YOU BASTARD! I COULDA BEEN KILLED!"

"But you didn't." Zoro grinned. "_Now _are you still scared of Shuusui?"

"YES!!" Usopp screamed.

"Huh… I guess I did it wrong, then." Zoro scratched the back of his neck.

"YA THINK?!?"

***

AN: I promise next one will be Franky/Robin.  
I think I'm forgetting one... so there's F/R then there's N/R. Including the Bon Clay chapter, there should be 37 total... someone let me know what I'm forgetting, please!  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	35. Robin and Franky

AN: It's Sanji/Chopper! That's the one I'm missing! Ack, how'd I miss that? *facepalm*

***

Title: Tickle Monster  
Characters: Robin and Franky  
Rating: K  
Summary: Franky tries to make Robin laugh. What a risky idea.  
A/N: This probably blatantly screams Frobin, but… I CAN'T HELP IT! WAAAH!!

***

Robin quietly flipped a page in her book, the glow from the aquarium making her hair look blue. A fish swam up to the glass and began ramming its head against it (Luffy had probably kept it out of the water too long) but Robin took no notice. Franky huffed in annoyance.

He was a man, dammit! And men couldn't live in silence! Frowning resolutely, Franky stood up and approached Robin, his feet noisily slapping against the tile floor. He loomed above her.

"Yes, Franky?" Robin asked, not looking up.

"You're too quiet." Franky said.

"Is that so?" Robin turned another page.

There was a long silence. Franky tried to think of a response.

"I think you need to laugh more, Nico Robin." Franky said.

She didn't answer for a second. "I would've thought you'd have grown tired of all the noise Captain-san makes."

"Eh, I got used to that." Franky lied. He nudged Robin's shoulder. "Come oooon. Can'tcha smile at least?"

The corners of her lips rose briefly then set down again.

"That didn't count!" Franky said. He suddenly grinned. "Don't make me tickle you, Nico Robin."

"I'm not ticklish."

"Oh, really?" Franky began tickling her ribs, but got no response. Looked like she wasn't lying after all.

"But I know you are."

"…Eh?" Franky stared at her, jaw slack. Without warning, four arms sprouted from his torso and began tickling him while two more restrained his own arms with startling strength.

Franky began crying at the same time he was laughing, unexpectedly. "Th-that's n-not- hah- fair! Waaahaaaah!"

Robin calmly flipped another page in her book as Franky rolled around the floor, laughing and crying as the arms tickled him mercilessly to no end.

***

AN: Heh heh e_e  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	36. Sanji and Chopper

AN: Hey, I submitted another thing on my Deviantart. Go check it out. Srsly!1!omg!! o_o  
(Link to my account can be found on my profile)

***

Title: Moustache?  
Characters: Sanji and Chopper  
Rating: K+ (it's Chopper, not Sanji, surprisingly)  
Summary: Chopper makes a startling discovery about Sanji's genes.  
A/N: Did you know it's possible to fall asleep during Gym class? Yes, it's true. I've done it before 8D

***

No one minded Chopper's mandatory monthly checkups, considering they would probably all be riddled with disease if he wasn't on the ship. Even though it was a bit odd having a human reindeer poking around places no one else was ever meant to poke, they knew it was for their own good and gratefully thanked Chopper for his troubles, sending him into violent wiggling of happiness.

"Okay Sanji, you're fine. Besides the fact that your lungs are filled with cigarette smoke and gunk." Chopper frowned, tapping Sanji's chest with a little hoof.

"No, I'm not giving up my cigarettes." Sanji said blandly, used to arguing about his smoking habits with the doctor.

"B-But you'll become really ill..." Chopper sniffled, his moist eyes peeking up at Sanji.

"Tell Usopp to stop teaching you how to fake innocence." Sanji said, lighting up a cigarette just to make his point.

"What're you talking about? I-I'm not faking, you bastard!" Chopper said hastily.

"Sure. Whatever you say." Sanji smiled. Chopper hopped off the stool and trotted over to a desk covered with papers. He carefully picked one out from the mess.

"I've made some interesting observations about the gene that controls the curliness of your eyebrow." Chopper said, all-business once again.

"What?"

"I hope you don't mind. I picked a couple hairs from you while you slept." Chopper said. "But I've found a lot of interesting stuff! Did you know that if you grow a moustache, it'll be as curly as your eyebrow?!?"

Sanji shuddered, imagining the marimo bastard calling him 'Tri-Swirl' or something equally unpleasant. "Are you trying to tell me something?"

"Well..." Chopper shyly rubbed his toe (hoof?) against the tile floor. "I think you should grow a curly moustache! It'd be so cool!"

"No."

"EH? That response is too quick!" Chopper said in shock.

"I'm not growing a moustache. I doubt Nami-swan and Robin-chwan would think it would be sexy." Sanji shook his head.

"But a _super curly moustache_, Sanji!!" Chopper shook the paper insistently.

"Maybe you should grow your own moustache then." Sanji shot back at him. Chopper thought about this for a second.

"No way! That's the stupidest idea ever!" Chopper grinned, wiggling his arms with joy. "I'm not going to try growing my own moustache! You bastard!"

Sanji took this opportunity to leave the infirmary, leaving Chopper shouting curses after him.

Later that night, Sanji found Chopper in the bathroom shouting "Grow, moustache!" at the mirror.

***

AN: Ignore the fact that reindeer probably can't even have facial hair (besides the fur... but that's beside the point).  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	37. Nami and Robin

AN: Oh noes, the last one! Or it's the second to last if I decide to do one final includes-the-whole-crew chapter. Thanks to everyone who reviewed, and special thanks to those who stuck through the entire way! You know who you are ;)  
In other news, I've uploaded a _new story_ (dum bum bum!)! It's basically a bunch of parodies. If you don't mind crude humor and OOCnes that's on purpose, go check it out.

***

Title: Learn to Hug  
Characters: Nami and Robin  
Rating: K+  
Summary: Nami thinks that Robin needs to learn how to hug.  
A/N: Sorry if this is too angsty… I _was _going to add a perverted Sanji at the end, but I thought it would ruin the moment. And since this is the last chapter, I included a second drabble that's more silly and quite possibly OOC.

***

Nami wasn't necessarily a light sleeper. Over the weeks and months, sleeping through the storm of the boy's snoring from the room below her taught her to ignore all sorts of sounds ranging from cannon blasts to sea king roars if the situation demanded it. But for some reason, the little exhale of breath that came from the bed beside hers that night brought Nami wide awake.

Maybe it was the sadness that Nami had detected in that barely audible sigh.

Nami listened carefully over the muffled snores from below for any other signs of hidden distress from her roommate, but there was none. She dismissed it and went back to sleep.

Nami woke up seconds later. She turned her head around. The other bed was empty. Frowning and rubbing her bleary eyes, Nami got out of bed and pulled on a pair of boots and went outside. She frowned again when she saw Robin standing at the railing her back turned to Nami.

"Robin? Did the morons' snoring wake you up too?" Nami asked.

"No. I'm sorry if I disturbed you, Navigator-san." Robin answered without turning around.

"What's up, then?" Nami walked up and leaned on the railing beside Robin. The sea was a flat plane of black glass beneath them.

"Just a bad dream." Robin casually answered.

"Oh…" Nami didn't know what to say. She had never thought of Robin as someone who got nightmares. "…Do you want to talk about it?"

"Not particularly." Robin said vaguely. At that moment, the ship slightly vibrated from a particularly booming snore (most likely from Franky).

"Heh. They're as noisy at night as they are during the day." Nami said. She chuckled uneasily and glanced at Robin. She was smiling, but Nami sensed it was in a forced kind of way. Nami crossed her arms. "Robin, look at me."

"Is something the matter?" Robin calmly gazed at Nami with placid blue eyes.

"That's what I asked you!" Nami fidgeted a little then suddenly pulled Robin into a tight hug.

"…!" Robin's words got stuck in her throat. Her arms hung motionlessly at her sides as Nami's breath warmed the crook of her neck.

"You need to learn how to hug back, Robin." Nami murmured as Robin stared down at the top of her orange head blankly.

"_So it seems_…" Robin thought inwardly.

Slowly, she returned Nami's hug and embraced her.

***

-Omake Drabble-

Nami's hands twitched. They were among the midst of an infinite number of pedestrians who reeked with the scent of money (no pun intended). Nami took a deep breath, inhaling the musty odor emanating from the many pockets just begging to be picked from. One jacket passed by her with a wallet clearly sticking out from a pocket, clear for the taking. Nami reached out.

And another hand stopped her. Nami pouted at Robin. Robin smiled and wagged a finger in a friendly scolding manner.

The jacket with the wallet disappeared into the crowds with its owner.

Nami grabbed Robin's hand and stuck out her lower lip like a child asking a parent for some candy. There was no way Nami could clear _all _of these people of their money by herself.

Robin shook her head.

Nami tugged more insistently.

"Robeeeen!"

Still no approval.

There was a quick muttered argument between them that lasted for no longer than a few seconds, but that was apparently enough to change Robin's mind.

Robin collapsed on the ground without warning.

Nami began shrieking, "ONEE-SAAAAN!!"

People gathered around the sobbing girl clinging to the unconscious woman on the ground, afraid to get closer but at the same time too worried to leave.

They were so busy watching the girl cry and scream for the woman that they failed to notice the arms discreetly sprouting from their legs and sides, picking out wallets with the skill and stealth of an assassin. More arms carefully carried the harvested treasures to an alley and hid them behind a stack of crates, several eyes dotted along the buildings to monitor their process.

Nami must have really put on quite a show because no one seemed to notice the arms or the fact that their pockets were lighter than before.

Robin stood up casually and dusted off her jeans as if nothing had happened. Nami stopped crying abruptly and laughed cheerfully.

"Silly onee-san, taking a nap in the middle of the street!"

The crowd groaned with both relief and disappointment, relieved that it was nothing serious and disappointed that the drama had ended so soon.

Once the crowd dispersed, Robin led Nami to the location where there was a good pile of fat wallets waiting to be gathered up.

Nami squealed with joy and squeezed Robin in a tight hug before diving into the wallets.

***

AN: Don't forget to check out my new story!  
And since the ending for this last one was unsatisfactory, I'm going to be adding just one final chapter eventually. It'll be soon, at least within a week.  
Reviews will be greatly appreciated.


	38. Everyone

AN: Long overdue... here's the last chapter of Flying with Albatrosses. Really, I didn't expect it to become so popular. Thanks for all your support!

***

Title: It's Not the Last Day  
Characters: Everyone  
Rating: K+  
Summary: Just as the title says. Why should we write about the end?  
A/N: And what was _your _favorite chapter, may I ask?

***

Luffy and Chopper tiptoed outside Nami and Robin's cabin, periodically shushing each other rather noisily. Luffy bit his lower lip and slowly eased the door open.

His face was immediately met with an angry fist, courtesy of Nami.

Nami angrily demanded _what the hell _he was doing outside their room in the middle of the night and Luffy simply grinned and said he wanted to play with them.

Nami groaned and slapped her forehead. Chopper was hiding behind Luffy. The wrong way, of course. The two boys were saved when Robin came outside to see what Nami was yelling about now. Chopper explained that the other guys were being waaay too sleepy and tired and lazy to play a game with them.

Robin suggested it was probably because of the extensive battle against the Marines they had fought just that evening before they collapsed in their beds.

Luffy pouted and said that _he _wasn't tired, and he _wanted to play_! Nami responded by kicking him in the gut.

Right at that moment, Usopp and Franky came out of the men's cabin, groggily demanding why they were making so much noise. Luffy took the chance to glomp them and ask them to play with him.

Of course, the two said no. Luffy frowned and set to chewing on Franky's hairdo, causing Franky to flail wildly and bellow at Luffy to _get the hell off_.

And this chain of events woke up the rest of the men, since Franky's yelling probably sounded like a hundred bounty hunters roaring a battle cry. Sanji, irritated that he had been woken up with no good cause, punted Luffy off of Franky and began groveling before Nami and Robin, asking them if they couldn't go to sleep and he would certainly be glad to share a bed if his body heat was needed and-

Nami kicked Sanji. Robin told him he was bleeding all over the deck, and Sanji began declaring that Robin's morbid statement was a sure sign of her love for him.

Usopp sighed and turned to go to bed when Chopper tugged on his feet, asking him to play. Unable to resist his little brother's request, Usopp picked up Chopper and flung him at Zoro, much to the reindeer's delight as he barreled into the half-asleep Zoro's head and clinged on to the mossy hair.

Zoro began running around in circles, roaring at Chopper to get off his head and that he couldn't breathe. Chopper growled at Zoro to stop being so noisy and promptly turned into Heavy Point, crushing Zoro beneath his weight.

Brook, who had been standing silently, finally asked if he could play a lullaby to bring them all to sleep again. Nami gratefully told him to do so and seemed relieved until Brook asked for her panties in exchange for a soothing tune.

Brook joined Sanji on the ground.

Meanwhile, Franky had finally yanked the laughing Chopper off of the suffocating Zoro. Zoro began blaming Sanji, inexplicably, sparking a fight between them. It was short-lived, since Nami beat the crap out of both of them in record time.

Robin quietly said it was probably too late for any of them to go to sleep anymore. Nami cried out in frustration and promptly latched onto Robin, sobbing _why _oh _why _did they have to be stuck with a bunch of morons. This sight spurred a fresh nosebleed from Sanji.

Luffy loudly said that as captain, he demand that everyone play a game with him.

Brook said he hoped it was a game that involved the women giving him their panties. This time, Nami didn't have to punch him because Sanji did it for her.

Usopp sighed and scolded everyone for their immaturity, prompting Zoro and Sanji to pummel him simultaneously.

Luffy's smile began to die down and he loudly complained that this game wasn't fun at all, not at all. Franky sarcastically asked why, and Luffy finally yawned and realized he was tired the whole time- he had just been "Mysteriously Half-Sleepwalking". Chopper shrugged and said he followed along because he was simply bored.

Nami facepalmed and kicked Luffy's shin out of frustration. Robin was forced to hold her back to prevent any more bodily injuries inflicted to their captain.

Brook found a jaw harp in his back pocket and began to play a twangy song that only sounded annoying, not soothing at all. Zoro snatched it away and threw it overboard before anyone else could comment.

Sanji tried to help Robin restrain Nami (as an excuse to hug the both of them at the same time), but this only infuriated Nami even further and cause her to accidently kick _Robin _instead of her intended target, which sent her into a string of hasty apologies and death glares at Sanji. Robin simply smiled and waved it off.

Usopp came to and realized that _Nami had kicked Robin_, and thus it-was-the-end-of-the-world-oh-god-everyone's-gonna-die-run-away-Nami-hurt-Robin-impossible-oh-no-oh-no-END-OF-THE-WORLD. Chopper dragged the panicking Usopp away to calm him down with a glass of warm milk.

Then Brook remembered he had already drunk all of their milk. Chopper shrieked and smacked Brook across the skull.

Luffy had fallen asleep in the middle of the deck. Zoro caught sight of the sleeping boy and was immediately affected. Like a tree, Zoro toppled over next to Luffy, blowing a snot bubble in time with his snores. Franky shrugged and sat on top of Zoro, pulled out a cola bottle out of God-knows-where, and proceeded to enjoy his beverage on top of his marimo seat.

Meanwhile, the sun began to rise above the purple ocean and slowly illuminated the bleary-eyed pirate crew.

"MORNING ALREADY?!?"

Nami groaned and pulled the highly amused Robin with her back into their room, barricading their door against the desperate Sanji. Franky lumbered into the kitchen to get more cola, seeing he was wide awake now and Chopper had calmed Usopp down and was leading him back to the men's cabin. Sanji knocked one last time on the ladies' door, sighed with defeat, and decided to drag the two idiots (Luffy and Zoro) away from the middle of the deck, seeing as they were an eyesore. Brook climbed up to the observation deck and began to play a morning awakening call before he, too, fell asleep in the middle of a chord.

And so it was another day for the Strawhat Pirates.

***

AN: ... and then there's Satirical Lulz. I'm shameless, advertising my own story like that...  
Thanks for reading, everyone!


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